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Exactly what kind of "lifestyle" doesn't permit an intimate relationship? Being a Catholic priest? Being a hermit like Unabomber Ted Kazcinski? If your lifes

by Arizhel 10y ago

Exactly what kind of "lifestyle" doesn't permit an intimate relationship? Being a Catholic priest? Being a hermit like Unabomber Ted Kazcinski? If your lifestyle doesn't permit an intimate relationship, which is one of the best things about being a human, then you need to find yourself a new lifestyle.

borplk 10y ago
Sorry but you are just naive.
- Arizhel 10y ago
  Wow, that's a really informative reply.
  - rnovak 10y ago
    Not everyone believes that romantic relationships are "one of the best things about being a human." Just because you believe it, doesn't mean everyone else does, or that you should imply that people are somehow "less than" for feeling otherwise. As to your other comment, have you considered people who have mental illnesses/disorders? Their lifestyle (in every sense of the word) would not permit a romantic relationship, too bad they can't just "find another one".
bmer 10y ago
You might be suffering from depression that is crippling enough that it would be cruel to ask someone to be with you.
- Arizhel 10y ago
  I guess when I hear the term "lifestyle", it seems to me like a way of life that's voluntarily chosen, rather than imposed by medical problems. Also, this was a response to a HN user asking about his particular situation, and no mention was made of any serious medical or psychological problems (other than a supposed "porn addiction") which would understandably make finding a long-term relationship difficult. I do agree with the GP that not everyone can just snap their fingers and "get a long term relationship", but for someone who has no other obvious impediments to one, and thinks they look at porn too much, my advice is to at least try. It seems obvious to me that the excessive porn is an outlet for frustration from not having a real relationship with a real human. There's only one reasonable way of solving that IMO, and that's going out and finding (or trying to find) such a relationship. Trying to turn yourself into Buddha is not reasonable IMO; people are supposed to have intimate relationships.

by Arizhel 10y ago

borplk 10y ago

Sorry but you are just naive.

Arizhel 10y ago
Wow, that's a really informative reply.
- rnovak 10y ago
  Not everyone believes that romantic relationships are "one of the best things about being a human." Just because you believe it, doesn't mean everyone else does, or that you should imply that people are somehow "less than" for feeling otherwise. As to your other comment, have you considered people who have mental illnesses/disorders? Their lifestyle (in every sense of the word) would not permit a romantic relationship, too bad they can't just "find another one".

bmer 10y ago

You might be suffering from depression that is crippling enough that it would be cruel to ask someone to be with you.

Arizhel 10y ago
I guess when I hear the term "lifestyle", it seems to me like a way of life that's voluntarily chosen, rather than imposed by medical problems. Also, this was a response to a HN user asking about his particular situation, and no mention was made of any serious medical or psychological problems (other than a supposed "porn addiction") which would understandably make finding a long-term relationship difficult. I do agree with the GP that not everyone can just snap their fingers and "get a long term relationship", but for someone who has no other obvious impediments to one, and thinks they look at porn too much, my advice is to at least try. It seems obvious to me that the excessive porn is an outlet for frustration from not having a real relationship with a real human. There's only one reasonable way of solving that IMO, and that's going out and finding (or trying to find) such a relationship. Trying to turn yourself into Buddha is not reasonable IMO; people are supposed to have intimate relationships.