Hey, thanks for sharing that. I hope it was as helpful to you sharing it as it was for me reading it. I really relate to your need to support your mom and sist

Hey, thanks for sharing that. I hope it was as helpful to you sharing it as it was for me reading it. I really relate to your need to support your mom and sister. Whether I wanted it or not, I was the 'man of the house' very early on. It's extremely unfair and affected every relationship I had up until I got divorced. I also relate to your missing/foggy memories. For a long time I couldn't remember the happy parts of my childhood. It was like life began for me when my parents divorced; and life was hell. If you haven't, consider therapy. I can't really describe how it helped me move past the emotions of my childhood, but it did. I have no issues remembering the happier times, and I can remember the miserable times without really feeling that black dread spreading across my stomach anymore. If you're still feeling it, you're stuck, and it's okay to get help with it. Trust me when I say you are not utterly broken. You've been tenacious in your pursuit of peace, be tenacious in your pursuit of a whole self.