4 ms·

You can't fight biology. Women are hardwired to look for men with resources or the ability to get them. It comes down to whether a man can provide the woman wi

by 20160226 10y ago

You can't fight biology. Women are hardwired to look for men with resources or the ability to get them. It comes down to whether a man can provide the woman with a safe and clean place to have her babies. In the past, this signal has taken the form of physical strength, number of slaves, land, goats, whatever. Today, it's jobs and/or money. Then add a layer of the instinctive hunger for status within any social species. For a given batch of economically successful women, most would rather share a successful man or stay single rather than compromise and mate with a low-status man with no resources. Can't blame women for looking for these things the same way men can't be blamed for looking for youth and fertility in a woman.

pharrington 10y ago
People are hardwired to prefer partners they find attractive. Beyond a well documented bias towards symmetry in and a certain range of ratios of physical features, attempts to find some sort of innately desirable traits that are not confounded by the incredible strong signals sent in a given culture & generation's media always fail. When you say, "Women are hardwired to look for men with resources or the ability to get them. It comes down to whether a man can provide the woman with a safe and clean place to have her babies," it's quite peculiar how societies with more of the first have a massive decline in the second. The snarky way to reply to this is, if you're so smart, why can't you get laid? edit: are not confounded by. Also, if you're downvoting in response to something other than the useless snark at the end of my post, please comment.
- ivrrimum 10y ago
  What has beeing smart to do with having money/social status? Nerds have always been a subject to ridicule. Regarding the original statement - I agree on both sides. I agree that women(same as men) have some biological broad idea of partner they would WANT to reproduce with. But with time and more experience in relationships, they might compromise.
PKop 10y ago
Not sure why getting downvoted. To dismiss out of hand thousands of years of evolution and think the last 50+ years of modern societal change can completely counteract biological forces is.. wishful thinking? I mean, this explanation is at least as good as any other speculation in this thread.
- pharrington 10y ago
  I did not downvote the parent. My claim: almost every human adult has had at least one sexual partner. I can only find decent studies surveying modernity, but for example: http://www.nbcnews.com/id/19374216/ http://www.nbcnews.com/id/19374216/. Assuming most humans having sex is not a recent development, any evolutionary pressures, if they exist at all, on the sexually active population are unclear at best; however, there may be pressures against the tiny few who go through life abstinent.
  - ThrowawayR2 10y ago
    Your claim might be false. "After a study by the National Institute of Population and Social Security Research last year found a massive increase in the number of virgins in [Japan], some academics criticised the way the research was reported. Of 5,000 single people surveyed, the government department found 42 per cent of men and 44 per cent of women had never had sex." http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/asia/japan-couples-sexless-marriages-half-low-birth-rate-long-working-hours-family-planning-children-a7581061.html http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/asia/japan-couples-s...
    - pharrington 10y ago
      My views of Japan's sexuality mostly align with those in that article. It talks about the recent trend of many Japanese not having sex (I claim that historically, most humans in general do have sex); furthermore, it claims a likely significant cause is the extreme pressures needed to maintain social status. It does quote a man citing similar trends in Britain; strange again, considering that at least as of 2014, studies show Britain having about a 4% virginity rate. Japan seems to be an outlier whose culture is resulting in a collapse of sexuality. Can you extrapolate evolutionary selection pressures from this?
astrange 10y ago
There's a lot of comments basically calling women golddigging p-zombies but not citing any evidence or personal experience here. I think that's more family pressure when it exists.
walterstucco 10y ago
> Today, it's jobs and/or money. or being supportive, or making their life better/easier/funnier. I have dated women that were higher status than me and I'm still friend with many of them. Being nice is a much more appreciated quality than being wealthy, especially if at work they must fight everyday to prove that their value is the same of men in the company, if not higher. The same applies to women: I prefer nicer ones and, I must say, usually it is associated with higher education. Not everyone can become rich or have a good job, that's true, but everyone can become a better man. EDIT: I'm in my 40s, not exactly a kid anymore.

pharrington 10y ago

People are hardwired to prefer partners they find attractive. Beyond a well documented bias towards symmetry in and a certain range of ratios of physical features, attempts to find some sort of innately desirable traits that are not confounded by the incredible strong signals sent in a given culture & generation's media always fail. When you say, "Women are hardwired to look for men with resources or the ability to get them. It comes down to whether a man can provide the woman with a safe and clean place to have her babies," it's quite peculiar how societies with more of the first have a massive decline in the second. The snarky way to reply to this is, if you're so smart, why can't you get laid? edit: are not confounded by. Also, if you're downvoting in response to something other than the useless snark at the end of my post, please comment.

ivrrimum 10y ago
What has beeing smart to do with having money/social status? Nerds have always been a subject to ridicule. Regarding the original statement - I agree on both sides. I agree that women(same as men) have some biological broad idea of partner they would WANT to reproduce with. But with time and more experience in relationships, they might compromise.

PKop 10y ago

Not sure why getting downvoted. To dismiss out of hand thousands of years of evolution and think the last 50+ years of modern societal change can completely counteract biological forces is.. wishful thinking? I mean, this explanation is at least as good as any other speculation in this thread.

pharrington 10y ago
I did not downvote the parent. My claim: almost every human adult has had at least one sexual partner. I can only find decent studies surveying modernity, but for example: http://www.nbcnews.com/id/19374216/ http://www.nbcnews.com/id/19374216/. Assuming most humans having sex is not a recent development, any evolutionary pressures, if they exist at all, on the sexually active population are unclear at best; however, there may be pressures against the tiny few who go through life abstinent.
- ThrowawayR2 10y ago
  Your claim might be false. "After a study by the National Institute of Population and Social Security Research last year found a massive increase in the number of virgins in [Japan], some academics criticised the way the research was reported. Of 5,000 single people surveyed, the government department found 42 per cent of men and 44 per cent of women had never had sex." http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/asia/japan-couples-sexless-marriages-half-low-birth-rate-long-working-hours-family-planning-children-a7581061.html http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/asia/japan-couples-s...
  - pharrington 10y ago
    My views of Japan's sexuality mostly align with those in that article. It talks about the recent trend of many Japanese not having sex (I claim that historically, most humans in general do have sex); furthermore, it claims a likely significant cause is the extreme pressures needed to maintain social status. It does quote a man citing similar trends in Britain; strange again, considering that at least as of 2014, studies show Britain having about a 4% virginity rate. Japan seems to be an outlier whose culture is resulting in a collapse of sexuality. Can you extrapolate evolutionary selection pressures from this?

astrange 10y ago

There's a lot of comments basically calling women golddigging p-zombies but not citing any evidence or personal experience here. I think that's more family pressure when it exists.

walterstucco 10y ago

> Today, it's jobs and/or money. or being supportive, or making their life better/easier/funnier. I have dated women that were higher status than me and I'm still friend with many of them. Being nice is a much more appreciated quality than being wealthy, especially if at work they must fight everyday to prove that their value is the same of men in the company, if not higher. The same applies to women: I prefer nicer ones and, I must say, usually it is associated with higher education. Not everyone can become rich or have a good job, that's true, but everyone can become a better man. EDIT: I'm in my 40s, not exactly a kid anymore.