7 ms·

ALWAYS put life/family/friends/experiences before work. The old adage that no one on their death bed ever wishes they worked more, is 100% true.

cryoshon 10y ago
sure, but nobody ever does this. they'd be poor.
droopyEyelids 10y ago
True, though no one with life ahead wishes for less financial security.
- zymhan 10y ago
  But what is that financial security for if you might not be around to enjoy it? It just hammers home for the that being ultra-frugal now so that you can live it up when you retire misses the fact that, well, you might just die one day and never have those experiences you put off in the name of saving money. You should live life as you go, not by putting it all off and saving it up
  - WalterSear 10y ago
    I have a number of elderly relatives who have been well and truly fucked by that philosophy.
  - cortesoft 10y ago
    Right, but there is a VERY good chance you are going to live long past your ability to continue to make money (most people do).... what then? If you haven't saved for retirement, you are going to be very miserable for a lot of years. I know way too many people in their 50s and 60s with no retirement savings. They are starting to be unable to continue working, but have YEARS left to support themselves. It is beyond sad.
  - kudokatz 10y ago
    > But what is that financial security for if you might not be around to enjoy it? It changes your whole outlook on life. When there is a reasonable amount of financial security, one can truly focus on the important things without considering money in the decisions. Many caveats apply of course, such as still maintaining good "financial hygiene". I'd strongly suggest at least trying one's best at getting up to $100k in investments plus a cash buffer and see how life is different! > You should live life as you go, not by Everybody has a different way to live life, but phrasing things this way makes it sound like you've already closed off listening to potential benefits of others' point of view.
zymhan 10y ago
And yet people are still asking "why is this on HN?" They're so focused on work that they can't take the time to realize they have tunnel vision.
Swizec 10y ago
But a lot of people in their 40's say they should've spent more time building a stronger career when they realize they're fucked because they're stuck in a job they hate for the next 30 years.
- tyingq 10y ago
  I'm well past 40, and not poor, but not rich. My time and attention has increasingly shifted from work to family since my late 30's. We've downsized our lifestyle to solve things more often than we've tried to find more income.
  - Swizec 10y ago
    Would you have been able to say the same if that focus started shifting in your late teens? The advice to work hard is aimed at 20 somethings. As you age, your focus should shift. That's the part we often seem to forget. My mum always said kids were her priority and that she focused on us and so on. As a result 3 of us lived in a tiny 2-bedroom apartment, she missed many promotions and was basically trapped in a just-above-foodstamps situation until I moved out. Her dream of publishing poetry and art in general never even had a chance to get started. 2 jobs, no time. Now she's in her 50's and has both more time and disposable income with me and my sister out of the picture. But the spark for poetry and art is gone, she didn't nurture it. Me, I don't want to repeat that.
    - tyingq 10y ago
      Yes...That's correct. I chased money up to a point and did well enough that I could let off the throttle after the kids were on their way out the door. I do see many of my peers, though, sort of trapped in trying to maintain the same lifestyle. I traded down to a modest house, drive old cars, etc. Not saying I'm somehow smarter. I did struggle a bit with my pride at first...giving up the nice house, cars, job titles and so forth.
      - jacquesm 10y ago
        > I traded down to a modest house, drive old cars, etc. That's a key element right there. Way too many people that I know live well above their actual means without realizing it. They somehow seem to think that as long as the bank is willing to finance it they should take the lifestyle as belonging to their status. It's an easy trap to fall in to, especially because all their other colleagues and siblings do the exact same thing. Little do they realize that they are effectively taking a mortgage on their future and that when the final bill is presented it won't be pretty. The only situation in which that has a 'happy ending' is when you die young and leave a pile of debt behind which can't be collected on. But if you have any dependents or a significant other then this is a surefire way to leave them to clean up your mess. If you don't absolutely have to borrow then don't, you don't need the fancy house and you don't need the fancy car. They'll end up becoming millstones around your neck if you are not careful.
badcede 10y ago
> The old adage that no one on their death bed ever wishes they worked more, is 100% true. https://books.google.com/books?id=e7OYYKACSiIC&pg=PA43&lpg=PA43&dq=al+franken+deathbed+office&source=bl&ots=7Iy1nXl5HR&sig=0n5ReU7gqhztYRiCz2wvIVQAs0A&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwj26vXRn7vSAhVO6GMKHa6OCzQQ6AEIJzAC#v=onepage&q=al%20franken%20deathbed%20office&f=false https://books.google.com/books?id=e7OYYKACSiIC&pg=PA43&lpg=P...
- MegaButts 10y ago
  I wonder that as well. I bet Elon Musk will regret not working more. 'If only I had worked a little harder, I could have accomplished more.' Likewise Nikola Tesla, Isaac Newton, Archimedes - I think they all languish how little time they had to work.
  - nether 10y ago
    Or dudes like my former manager, who would regularly take work with him on vacation, unpaid, not in a crunch or anything.
    - reinhardt 10y ago
      Maybe, just maybe, he's getting bored out of his skull on vacation and his work provides him with at least intellectual stimulation, unlike, say, long walks on the beach, gazing the sunset or whatever "things that matter" people supposedly wish for on their death bed.
      - jacobush 10y ago
        Riiiiight
  - Arizhel 10y ago
    Actually, I read somewhere that Nikola Tesla actually lamented later in life that he didn't put any effort into dating. Tesla was very devoted to his work, but he wasn't a complete hermit like Isaac Newton; he was also a bit of a showman, doing elaborate public demonstrations with electricity.

cryoshon 10y ago

sure, but nobody ever does this. they'd be poor.

droopyEyelids 10y ago

True, though no one with life ahead wishes for less financial security.

zymhan 10y ago
But what is that financial security for if you might not be around to enjoy it? It just hammers home for the that being ultra-frugal now so that you can live it up when you retire misses the fact that, well, you might just die one day and never have those experiences you put off in the name of saving money. You should live life as you go, not by putting it all off and saving it up
- WalterSear 10y ago
  I have a number of elderly relatives who have been well and truly fucked by that philosophy.
- cortesoft 10y ago
  Right, but there is a VERY good chance you are going to live long past your ability to continue to make money (most people do).... what then? If you haven't saved for retirement, you are going to be very miserable for a lot of years. I know way too many people in their 50s and 60s with no retirement savings. They are starting to be unable to continue working, but have YEARS left to support themselves. It is beyond sad.
- kudokatz 10y ago
  > But what is that financial security for if you might not be around to enjoy it? It changes your whole outlook on life. When there is a reasonable amount of financial security, one can truly focus on the important things without considering money in the decisions. Many caveats apply of course, such as still maintaining good "financial hygiene". I'd strongly suggest at least trying one's best at getting up to $100k in investments plus a cash buffer and see how life is different! > You should live life as you go, not by Everybody has a different way to live life, but phrasing things this way makes it sound like you've already closed off listening to potential benefits of others' point of view.

zymhan 10y ago

And yet people are still asking "why is this on HN?" They're so focused on work that they can't take the time to realize they have tunnel vision.

Swizec 10y ago

But a lot of people in their 40's say they should've spent more time building a stronger career when they realize they're fucked because they're stuck in a job they hate for the next 30 years.

tyingq 10y ago
I'm well past 40, and not poor, but not rich. My time and attention has increasingly shifted from work to family since my late 30's. We've downsized our lifestyle to solve things more often than we've tried to find more income.
- Swizec 10y ago
  Would you have been able to say the same if that focus started shifting in your late teens? The advice to work hard is aimed at 20 somethings. As you age, your focus should shift. That's the part we often seem to forget. My mum always said kids were her priority and that she focused on us and so on. As a result 3 of us lived in a tiny 2-bedroom apartment, she missed many promotions and was basically trapped in a just-above-foodstamps situation until I moved out. Her dream of publishing poetry and art in general never even had a chance to get started. 2 jobs, no time. Now she's in her 50's and has both more time and disposable income with me and my sister out of the picture. But the spark for poetry and art is gone, she didn't nurture it. Me, I don't want to repeat that.
  - tyingq 10y ago
    Yes...That's correct. I chased money up to a point and did well enough that I could let off the throttle after the kids were on their way out the door. I do see many of my peers, though, sort of trapped in trying to maintain the same lifestyle. I traded down to a modest house, drive old cars, etc. Not saying I'm somehow smarter. I did struggle a bit with my pride at first...giving up the nice house, cars, job titles and so forth.
    - jacquesm 10y ago
      > I traded down to a modest house, drive old cars, etc. That's a key element right there. Way too many people that I know live well above their actual means without realizing it. They somehow seem to think that as long as the bank is willing to finance it they should take the lifestyle as belonging to their status. It's an easy trap to fall in to, especially because all their other colleagues and siblings do the exact same thing. Little do they realize that they are effectively taking a mortgage on their future and that when the final bill is presented it won't be pretty. The only situation in which that has a 'happy ending' is when you die young and leave a pile of debt behind which can't be collected on. But if you have any dependents or a significant other then this is a surefire way to leave them to clean up your mess. If you don't absolutely have to borrow then don't, you don't need the fancy house and you don't need the fancy car. They'll end up becoming millstones around your neck if you are not careful.

badcede 10y ago

> The old adage that no one on their death bed ever wishes they worked more, is 100% true. https://books.google.com/books?id=e7OYYKACSiIC&pg=PA43&lpg=PA43&dq=al+franken+deathbed+office&source=bl&ots=7Iy1nXl5HR&sig=0n5ReU7gqhztYRiCz2wvIVQAs0A&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwj26vXRn7vSAhVO6GMKHa6OCzQQ6AEIJzAC#v=onepage&q=al%20franken%20deathbed%20office&f=false https://books.google.com/books?id=e7OYYKACSiIC&pg=PA43&lpg=P...

MegaButts 10y ago
I wonder that as well. I bet Elon Musk will regret not working more. 'If only I had worked a little harder, I could have accomplished more.' Likewise Nikola Tesla, Isaac Newton, Archimedes - I think they all languish how little time they had to work.
- nether 10y ago
  Or dudes like my former manager, who would regularly take work with him on vacation, unpaid, not in a crunch or anything.
  - reinhardt 10y ago
    Maybe, just maybe, he's getting bored out of his skull on vacation and his work provides him with at least intellectual stimulation, unlike, say, long walks on the beach, gazing the sunset or whatever "things that matter" people supposedly wish for on their death bed.
    - jacobush 10y ago
      Riiiiight
- Arizhel 10y ago
  Actually, I read somewhere that Nikola Tesla actually lamented later in life that he didn't put any effort into dating. Tesla was very devoted to his work, but he wasn't a complete hermit like Isaac Newton; he was also a bit of a showman, doing elaborate public demonstrations with electricity.