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I'm not saying it's okay to proposition a coworker but I've seen several women flirt their way into favor in the office. It's happened to me a couple times, it'
by kneel 10y ago
I'm not saying it's okay to proposition a coworker but I've seen several women flirt their way into favor in the office. It's happened to me a couple times, it's really confusing.
Combine that with the socially inept male dominated software environment and you can pretty much expect scandalous things to happen.
- kchoudhu 10y agoThis just feeds into my 1-10 question: just because someone propositioned me because I happen to be in a position of power doesn't mean I'm going to respond to it by bestowing favor. The socially inept thing probably accounts for a lot of the problem.
- sidlls 10y agoYeah, and when I taught I'd regularly have some female students come to office hours in revealing clothes or try to sit closer than others and so on. Two things occur to me: 1) neither of those things means those students were engaging in "flirting their way to favor": maybe, just maybe, they were dressing comfortably for them or they absorbed our discussion better by sitting closer and my biases and (mis-?)perceptions were at work; 2) even if they were "flirting," as a responsible adult male it was my responsibility to ignore it, or even raise a concern if I felt it were intentional and damaging to the student-teacher relationship.
- hackuser 10y agoOr maybe it wasn't you they were flirting with. :)
- sidlls 10y agoYes, that is another possibility. Which was my point: even at the time it never occurred to me to interpret their dress or behavior as being flirtatious with me. This should be the default consideration for adult men to have.
- hackuser 10y agoSorry if I gave the wrong impression. Clearly you have the judgment to understand that. I was just elaborating by pointing out an aspect of people in positions of power and their egos - 'obviously she's infatuated with me'.
- sidlls 10y agoNah, I wasn't clear enough in the original comment.