That's a tough one free will. I usually default to "what if you killed yourself" but then you follow it up with "Well but by killing yourself..." ahhh It does

That's a tough one free will. I usually default to "what if you killed yourself" but then you follow it up with "Well but by killing yourself..." ahhh It does drive you insane to think you're just in this infinite sized thing and you're this thing that creates a perception of your external container and soon you'll cease to exist, does the world cease to exist as well, hard to imagine just not being. Guess time to find out haha. I also laugh at my own problems and then you just imagine zooming out of the Earth and being in space. Nothing there, no laws, money, just you and your mortality. I have a cat and I was just holding him one day and I was like "holy cow here is this living thing that evolve along side us" I just stared at my cat for a bit. Odd. this living thing independent of me. Why does a seed grow? hahaha why does the Gerbil run in circles.