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Ask HN: Best way to tell your current job you want to quit

In my last 3 jobs I've left, everytime I've given my job the notice that I am leaving whether I've accepted a new position or not. The CEO/HR says they wish I would have let them know I was looking to leave so that I could have talked to them about it. I always feel a little bad, like I handled the situation poorly, has anyone done this before? What is the best way to handle the situation?

tsukikage 10y ago
Is there something they can offer you that would convince you to stay? If so, consider asking for that thing before you commit to leaving. Otherwise, it is in your interest not to say anything until you have the exit strategy in place.
- throwaway82818 10y ago
  That is generally how I look at the situation. If I didn't want to get a counter offer (or some promotion or something). I just wanted to leave on good terms, with plenty of notice given. I just could not understand the logic of me telling them I wanted to leave prior to securing or even looking for a new job.
basseq 10y ago
Done right, you never have to tell them you're looking to leave. That's almost petulant or comes across as an ultimatum. Instead, talk about the issues you're facing or the opportunities you're looking for early and often—and get commitment on timelines for improvement. If you still get to the point where you leave, you can point to those conversations. Leaving is a logical output of your needs not being met.
JSeymourATL 10y ago
> The CEO/HR says they wish I would have let them know ... It's a fair question for anyone concerned about company culture. Talent retention is a huge issue. When you resign it's a signal that something is not working with their model. Maybe others will bolt for the same reason. It's also true that senior executives dislike the mollycoddling aspects of dealing with 'people' issues. Take the high road say, "I've been very happy here, but I've been approached with an offer I can't refuse, significant bump in salary, professional growth, and shorter commute."
brudgers 10y ago
To me, if an employee leaving for normal career reasons comes as a surprise to management, it reflects the communication values in the company culture. I mean, the CEO/HR saying 'I wish you had talked to us earlier' turns the problem on its head. Retention isn't the responsibility of employees. It's management's. The appropriate wish would be that the CEO/management had checked in with the employee earlier. Without checking in, there's no way to establish a relationship of trust that is necessary when it comes to initiating career decisions. The CEO/management coming to your cubicle a few times a year just to see how you were doing and offering 'If you ever start thinking about leaving us, let me know so we can talk about it' might overcome the worry that announcing a resignation triggers retribution. Yeah, doing so would be a lot of work and if it isn't done then it isn't important.

tsukikage 10y ago

Is there something they can offer you that would convince you to stay? If so, consider asking for that thing before you commit to leaving. Otherwise, it is in your interest not to say anything until you have the exit strategy in place.

throwaway82818 10y ago
That is generally how I look at the situation. If I didn't want to get a counter offer (or some promotion or something). I just wanted to leave on good terms, with plenty of notice given. I just could not understand the logic of me telling them I wanted to leave prior to securing or even looking for a new job.

basseq 10y ago

Done right, you never have to tell them you're looking to leave. That's almost petulant or comes across as an ultimatum. Instead, talk about the issues you're facing or the opportunities you're looking for early and often—and get commitment on timelines for improvement. If you still get to the point where you leave, you can point to those conversations. Leaving is a logical output of your needs not being met.

JSeymourATL 10y ago

> The CEO/HR says they wish I would have let them know ... It's a fair question for anyone concerned about company culture. Talent retention is a huge issue. When you resign it's a signal that something is not working with their model. Maybe others will bolt for the same reason. It's also true that senior executives dislike the mollycoddling aspects of dealing with 'people' issues. Take the high road say, "I've been very happy here, but I've been approached with an offer I can't refuse, significant bump in salary, professional growth, and shorter commute."

brudgers 10y ago

To me, if an employee leaving for normal career reasons comes as a surprise to management, it reflects the communication values in the company culture. I mean, the CEO/HR saying 'I wish you had talked to us earlier' turns the problem on its head. Retention isn't the responsibility of employees. It's management's. The appropriate wish would be that the CEO/management had checked in with the employee earlier. Without checking in, there's no way to establish a relationship of trust that is necessary when it comes to initiating career decisions. The CEO/management coming to your cubicle a few times a year just to see how you were doing and offering 'If you ever start thinking about leaving us, let me know so we can talk about it' might overcome the worry that announcing a resignation triggers retribution. Yeah, doing so would be a lot of work and if it isn't done then it isn't important.