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When Dell was breeched a few years back my details made their way to India. I get a call from them about once a month. I've learned the script and various vec

When Dell was breeched a few years back my details made their way to India. I get a call from them about once a month. I've learned the script and various vectors they try to get the software onto my computer. The longest I've had them on the phone is 20 minutes. He's one of my favourite recordings though https://soundcloud.com/radiorental1/dellsupport2 https://soundcloud.com/radiorental1/dellsupport2 It's funny, someone pointed me at this thread because I sort of sound similar to the OP's site.

gloverkcn 10y ago
20 min is pretty good. I will usually get called while away from my computer. I try to see how long I can go from memory of windows (been using Mac for 8 years). Once they pass me to their manager I know they've caught on I'm fucking with them. The second guy is clearly more technical/experienced and starts trying to determine as fast as possible if I'm legit. My "computer" will slow down at that point, then, I ask stuff like "can you guys fix this as well?" I love it when the person yells at me for wasting their time.
- radiorental 10y ago
  I'm on mac too with a win7 vm, I hit upon the idea of tagging them along as far as I could when they asked me to press the windows key and I'm looking at a mac keyboard. The different shops that have called me all follow a similar set of attacks 1) windows key 2) run command to msconfig 3) browser to download payload. I had a 'supervisor' on the line once and when they asked me to connect to the internet I'm pretty sure I heard them curse at me with incredulity as I played the 56K dialup sound. I once got them down a conversation cul-de-sac when I asked them which they preferred - Minesweeper or Solitaire.
  - karmajunkie 10y ago
    I usually tell them its a hyper key...
  - at-fates-hands 10y ago
    >> I'm pretty sure I heard them curse at me with incredulity as I played the 56K dialup sound. That is some comedy GOLD right there.
  - lighttower 10y ago
    Oh do you have that recording. Awesome
    - radiorental 10y ago
      I lost them cursing at me and I don't have the Solitaire v. Minesweeper discussion recorded but here's something similar at 11 minutes https://soundcloud.com/radiorental1/dell-support https://soundcloud.com/radiorental1/dell-support
      - elsurudo 10y ago
        Hah, this was great, listened to the whole thing. You had some nice tricks up your sleeve, laughed out loud a couple of times. Thanks! Love the response you got at the end...
  - gloverkcn 10y ago
    Awesome! Yeah they always use the prompt to get to the admin panel with the list of errors and logs to prove there's an issue. I always act nervous. "There's a lot, Is it that bad?", and they respond with "don't worry sir, we're going to get it fixed for you".
- SomeCallMeTim 10y ago
  I've only played along once, when the guy called while I was cooking lunch, but yes, after 15 minutes or so the "manager" came on and cursed me out very vehemently. I told him he should be ashamed for scamming people.
krisroadruck 10y ago
That was fantastic, thank you for the morning laugh :-)
traxmaxx 10y ago
Is that a goat around 1:45? : D
- radiorental 10y ago
  Yeah... I was play 10hours of farm noises in the background. I've had this plan for a while to get to the point where a 'generator' fails and I get to play the most awesome sound of someone firing up an old helicopter (i.e. restarting the 'generator' It didn't get that far on that call. My thinking is that I was on a farm and one of the goats would chew through a power line. For the next call I'm going to be on a construction site. I really want to play that helicopter noise... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WuwQWlz7ink https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WuwQWlz7ink
itstriz 10y ago
I just lost it when he asks you to connect to the internet. Great call!
nommm-nommm 10y ago
Omg, hilarious, I laughed the entire way through. Your creativity was/is genius. I love the animal sounds in the background. Were they real? Edit: you said in another post further down it was a recording.
ben1040 10y ago
The plot twist at 8:10 had me doubled over laughing.
brandon272 10y ago
I was losing it with the farm animals in the background. So funny.
mayreck 10y ago
BAHAHAHAHHA OMG
nickthemagicman 10y ago
You just made my commute way better. I lost it at the end when you played the modem sound. Also asking how to spell romeo was hilarious.
brokenmachine 10y ago
I had one call at home that I kept on for over 30 minutes, just coming back every 5 minutes or so and saying, "hold on, I'm just doing something, I'll be right with you", "sorry, just need to do this, I'm really sorry about the wait", etc, etc. I did put some music on in the background so they might have enjoyed that.

gloverkcn 10y ago

20 min is pretty good. I will usually get called while away from my computer. I try to see how long I can go from memory of windows (been using Mac for 8 years). Once they pass me to their manager I know they've caught on I'm fucking with them. The second guy is clearly more technical/experienced and starts trying to determine as fast as possible if I'm legit. My "computer" will slow down at that point, then, I ask stuff like "can you guys fix this as well?" I love it when the person yells at me for wasting their time.

radiorental 10y ago
I'm on mac too with a win7 vm, I hit upon the idea of tagging them along as far as I could when they asked me to press the windows key and I'm looking at a mac keyboard. The different shops that have called me all follow a similar set of attacks 1) windows key 2) run command to msconfig 3) browser to download payload. I had a 'supervisor' on the line once and when they asked me to connect to the internet I'm pretty sure I heard them curse at me with incredulity as I played the 56K dialup sound. I once got them down a conversation cul-de-sac when I asked them which they preferred - Minesweeper or Solitaire.
- karmajunkie 10y ago
  I usually tell them its a hyper key...
- at-fates-hands 10y ago
  >> I'm pretty sure I heard them curse at me with incredulity as I played the 56K dialup sound. That is some comedy GOLD right there.
- lighttower 10y ago
  Oh do you have that recording. Awesome
  - radiorental 10y ago
    I lost them cursing at me and I don't have the Solitaire v. Minesweeper discussion recorded but here's something similar at 11 minutes https://soundcloud.com/radiorental1/dell-support https://soundcloud.com/radiorental1/dell-support
    - elsurudo 10y ago
      Hah, this was great, listened to the whole thing. You had some nice tricks up your sleeve, laughed out loud a couple of times. Thanks! Love the response you got at the end...
- gloverkcn 10y ago
  Awesome! Yeah they always use the prompt to get to the admin panel with the list of errors and logs to prove there's an issue. I always act nervous. "There's a lot, Is it that bad?", and they respond with "don't worry sir, we're going to get it fixed for you".
SomeCallMeTim 10y ago
I've only played along once, when the guy called while I was cooking lunch, but yes, after 15 minutes or so the "manager" came on and cursed me out very vehemently. I told him he should be ashamed for scamming people.

krisroadruck 10y ago

That was fantastic, thank you for the morning laugh :-)

traxmaxx 10y ago

Is that a goat around 1:45? : D

radiorental 10y ago
Yeah... I was play 10hours of farm noises in the background. I've had this plan for a while to get to the point where a 'generator' fails and I get to play the most awesome sound of someone firing up an old helicopter (i.e. restarting the 'generator' It didn't get that far on that call. My thinking is that I was on a farm and one of the goats would chew through a power line. For the next call I'm going to be on a construction site. I really want to play that helicopter noise... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WuwQWlz7ink https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WuwQWlz7ink

itstriz 10y ago

I just lost it when he asks you to connect to the internet. Great call!

nommm-nommm 10y ago

Omg, hilarious, I laughed the entire way through. Your creativity was/is genius. I love the animal sounds in the background. Were they real? Edit: you said in another post further down it was a recording.

ben1040 10y ago

The plot twist at 8:10 had me doubled over laughing.

brandon272 10y ago

I was losing it with the farm animals in the background. So funny.

mayreck 10y ago

BAHAHAHAHHA OMG

nickthemagicman 10y ago

You just made my commute way better. I lost it at the end when you played the modem sound. Also asking how to spell romeo was hilarious.

brokenmachine 10y ago

I had one call at home that I kept on for over 30 minutes, just coming back every 5 minutes or so and saying, "hold on, I'm just doing something, I'll be right with you", "sorry, just need to do this, I'm really sorry about the wait", etc, etc. I did put some music on in the background so they might have enjoyed that.