ITT: relationship-hacking. Or maybe. . . cultural-norms-hacking? I dunno. I've known quite a few poly people. Most of them are indeed, quite miserable, and

ITT: relationship-hacking. Or maybe. . . cultural-norms-hacking? I dunno. I've known quite a few poly people. Most of them are indeed, quite miserable, and in some way or another, I see them as being an abusive relationship, where one person is enthusiastic about being poly, and the other is kind of forced into it because they have low self-esteem, or otherwise feel trapped. It's sad. On the other hand, I do know of at least a couple of people who are in, as I see it, quite happy, healthy, and equitable arrangements. In either case, I don't really judge these lifestyle choices. What I don't "approve" of is manipulation and lying (infidelity). And that happens. It happens in poly relationships (where the liar will hide behind their poly status as a way to get blanket permission to do whatever, and exclude the other partner from knowing, because it's uncomfortable). But the ones who are mature enough to not resort to abusive tactics, I say more power to them. How do I have the right to tell other people how to live their lives, if it makes them happy? Myself, personally, I don't think I could ever be in a poly relationship. I have a hard enough time with mono relationships. I would hope that if we had a more open society that came to mass-acceptance of poly relationships as a legitimate thing, that poly people would also respect those of us who want to be monogamous, and our "boring" lifestyles. Or maybe those of us who may choose no relationships. Indeed, some of these poly friends of mine are quite scornful of the monos. We're backwards, and old fashioned, burdened with some horrible, medieval "patriarchal" lifestyle. And they assume we're all judging them. Whatever.