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>Most people without children just don't get how much more difficult ordinary life becomes. This is a common thing to hear from parents but I feel it misses th

by djm_ 10y ago

>Most people without children just don't get how much more difficult ordinary life becomes. This is a common thing to hear from parents but I feel it misses the mark for some couples that have rationally decided not to have children for precisely the reasons you stated. I think the difficulty you mentioned is actually a large reason as to why less couples are having kids in the first place. Edit: completely reworded.

selectodude 10y ago
How is that even slightly relevant? Everyone knows that kids are a pain in the ass. Everyone who has kids says "I knew they were a pain in the ass but they are way more of a pain than I even anticipated." So no, you don't know. You think you know but you don't. Continue not having kids. I will also continue not having kids. But don't be the "well I haven't seen it because I don't have a tv" guy because nobody gives a shit.
ams6110 10y ago
As a parent of three I never thought of it as difficulty so much as it just really forever changes things compared to how you lived as a single person or childless couple. You can understand that well enough to decide that you don't want any part of it, without understanding it to the depth of a person who has experienced it.
- djm_ 10y ago
  Yes, fully agree.
- human_breather 10y ago
  I agree, but I'm often confused by those without kids or those who say that having a kid totally changed people's lifestyles unexpectedly. For me, having a kid has certainly been an (expected) money drain. But beyond that, my life is pretty similar to pre-kid. Wife and I still work our day jobs. Outside of work we still enjoy the same sorts of things we enjoyed before having a kid and continue to do those things. Now we just have an extra source of entertainment and responsibility in the kid as well.
darpa_escapee 10y ago
I'm not a parent for those reasons. However, if you haven't experienced something for yourself, you cannot truly know what it is like. This is true of everything, including parenting.
Nomentatus 10y ago
Not exclusionary. Knowing it would be best to avoid being hit over the head by hammer, is not the same as experiencing being hit over the head with a hammer. Knowing you should avoid it and roughly why, and knowing what it's like when it happens are still very different things. (This is Bertrand Russell's distinction between "knowledge by description" and "knowledge by acquaintance.")

by djm_ 10y ago

selectodude 10y ago

How is that even slightly relevant? Everyone knows that kids are a pain in the ass. Everyone who has kids says "I knew they were a pain in the ass but they are way more of a pain than I even anticipated." So no, you don't know. You think you know but you don't. Continue not having kids. I will also continue not having kids. But don't be the "well I haven't seen it because I don't have a tv" guy because nobody gives a shit.

ams6110 10y ago

As a parent of three I never thought of it as difficulty so much as it just really forever changes things compared to how you lived as a single person or childless couple. You can understand that well enough to decide that you don't want any part of it, without understanding it to the depth of a person who has experienced it.

djm_ 10y ago
Yes, fully agree.
human_breather 10y ago
I agree, but I'm often confused by those without kids or those who say that having a kid totally changed people's lifestyles unexpectedly. For me, having a kid has certainly been an (expected) money drain. But beyond that, my life is pretty similar to pre-kid. Wife and I still work our day jobs. Outside of work we still enjoy the same sorts of things we enjoyed before having a kid and continue to do those things. Now we just have an extra source of entertainment and responsibility in the kid as well.

darpa_escapee 10y ago

I'm not a parent for those reasons. However, if you haven't experienced something for yourself, you cannot truly know what it is like. This is true of everything, including parenting.

Nomentatus 10y ago

Not exclusionary. Knowing it would be best to avoid being hit over the head by hammer, is not the same as experiencing being hit over the head with a hammer. Knowing you should avoid it and roughly why, and knowing what it's like when it happens are still very different things. (This is Bertrand Russell's distinction between "knowledge by description" and "knowledge by acquaintance.")