4 ms·
I think you making a totally fair point about the symmetry of the situation. However, I think his attitude (and by symmetry probably hers too) is an unhealthy o
by rortian 16y ago
I think you making a totally fair point about the symmetry of the situation. However, I think his attitude (and by symmetry probably hers too) is an unhealthy one. He can always think, "were it not for her attitude I, errr we, could be more successful". This is quite a negative thought to hold in your head with someone that you should have an amicable rapport with.
>You should not think about someone's happiness, that does not also think about your own.
I guess you can live by that, but I certainly don't like the dynamics of this towards the limit. If somebody is hurting I don't mind trying to say something. Suffering isn't cool.
- doki_pen 16y agoAre you married? There is much more to marriage then love. It is a legally binding contract and there are serious consequences for breaking it. Not to mention the social and emotional consequences. There are usually children involved.
- jdunck 16y agoIf that is your line of reasoning for staying married, it's an unhealthy situation, probably not good for the kids, etc. People in such situations should focus on communication and progress, possibly with the help of a therapist. Or end the marriage. But plodding along blaming your spouse for your terrible lot in life is no way to raise a family (or save some money). I've been married 10 years. It's up and down, but in the end, it's what you make of it.
- doki_pen 16y agoPoint taken, but sometimes people just like to bitch about things. It doesn't always mean much. There is always a struggle between selfishness and selflessness. Sometimes marriage is a zero sum game.