You need to find better role models for healthy relationships. Reading this is like reading the comments of somebody in their mid-20s who has known nothing but

You need to find better role models for healthy relationships. Reading this is like reading the comments of somebody in their mid-20s who has known nothing but abusive relationships and been rejected multiple times who has decided all relationships are disgusting. If that is the case for you, I hope you can open your mind enough to being loved by somebody who can show you the truth. I don't know any couple who belittle or control each other, and certainly don't disrespect each other. If I did, I'd recommend they get the hell away from each other as quickly as possible. Romance is not about pleasing one person at the expense of the other, it's about two people who love each other exploring the mystery of that love. I've been with my partner for over 7 years. She's my best friend. We respect each other, and if one of us thinks the other one is not taking our own needs into account we talk about it and compromise. The fact that your friend has chosen to prioritise his wife's feelings over his career is his choice. If he hasn't made it gladly and freely, then he needs to get out.