>"I interpreted your comment about "self-aware point scoring" to mean that you shouldn't think of relationships as transactional, or be too concerned with wheth

>"I interpreted your comment about "self-aware point scoring" to mean that you shouldn't think of relationships as transactional, or be too concerned with whether your contributions to them are reciprocated." If you want my honest, non-expert answer, making relationships transactional means making them closer to business arrangements. Maybe that's what some people are comfortable with, but I prefer when my personal relationships are a little more spontaneous and free. So, for me, relationships shouldn't be transactional. How do you stop getting screwed over? I'd say it comes down to trust. Trust is something that builds up over time. The more you trust someone the more you can give without expecting something in return. Trust is based on support, but it's not something you have to actively track, it's something you feel (or don't feel). When trust starts to breaks down, that's the time to either work on it together or cut your losses.