I have been living with sustained emotional stress for the last six months. There are days I go to work and as I'm driving in my car at a certain point I scream

I have been living with sustained emotional stress for the last six months. There are days I go to work and as I'm driving in my car at a certain point I scream from the trauma. It's the only place I can do it, I don't dare do it around my family, friends or work colleagues. And I absolutely cannot talk to anyone involved in medicine, because their treatment for suicidal ideation from a mental breakdown has the unique side effect of making me feel like I want to die to escape the disrespect and indignity of being treated like a criminal who must be locked away.