> Realizing that anxiety isn't who you are, but more like a disturbance that will pass This is the right attitude during an anxiety attack, because while it is

> Realizing that anxiety isn't who you are, but more like a disturbance that will pass This is the right attitude during an anxiety attack, because while it is happening there isn't much you can do but to remind yourself that it's going to pass. However, my personal experience is that anxiety is not a random infliction but something that can have very concrete causes that need to be worked on. Identifying these causes can be a long process, though. In many cases anxieties arise when we have deeply rooted unhealthy habits that seem so much part of our lives that it doesn't even occur to us that they could possibly be changed. OP writes that his wife had to commute four hours a day which in itself will affect mental well-being but which may also point to career issues. Fixing that was apparently part of the solution.