For me the reason pointers were hard is because I didn't get clear feedback when I dereferenced them. When pointers are taught conceptually they don't tell you

For me the reason pointers were hard is because I didn't get clear feedback when I dereferenced them. When pointers are taught conceptually they don't tell you that there is a kernel terminating the program because you access invalid memory. I confused that termination with the idea that my pointer has never been dereferenced in the first place. Now, I don't know if the kernel intervenes before the invalid address is going to be dereferenced or just after it. The thing is, I understood the concept, but getting this error was giving me doubt since I made an error of accessing valid memory. Once I understood that I tried to force a normal int to become a pointer and eventually it worked (needed two ints and an 8-bit variable to cast it to a 64 bit address), proving to me that I understood the concept. Accessing (valid) memory and pointers should be explained together.