3 ms·

It sounds a little like learned helplessness ... having spent some time in the UK I have noticed this unquestioning deference to "ones betters" and I wonder how

It sounds a little like learned helplessness ... having spent some time in the UK I have noticed this unquestioning deference to "ones betters" and I wonder how it comes about. How is this trait acquired?

alsetmusic 10y ago
I got it from my father, who rose from poor to wealthy through education. He taught me that education was all that mattered. When I achieved a prestigious Silicon Valley position after dropping out of college, I considered myself a fake who would be discovered at any moment for a long time. All my colleagues had compsci degrees. Thing is, I eventually discovered that I could hold my own. What my father taught me is only one way to achieve success, as I later realized. But that he taught it as dogma crippled me for a long time.
- nsomaru 10y ago
  There is a difference between 'having a degree' and 'being educated.' Maybe you did make it the way your dad showed you :)
  - efaref 10y ago
    Hence the quote, "I never let my schooling get in the way of my education."
sangnoir 10y ago
> How is this trait acquired? It is acquired socially. The UK has a formalised class system dating back to the "divine right of kings". The "ruling elite" are rather literal as the membership of the upper house (House of Lords) is limited to hereditary peerage.
- ricksplat 10y ago
  But I mean day to day how's is this reinforced. Is there some kind of subtle bullying or gaslighting going on?
- stevetrewick 10y ago
  92 out of 813 seats are hereditary peers, the remainder are life peers [Edit: forgot the Bishops] appointed (technically) by the monarch on the advice of the government. There's really no such thing as a class 'system', let alone anything one could point to as being 'formal'. There is a bunch of in/out group signalling with fairly extreme geographic variations. Mobility across social boundaries can be achieved by understanding and adapting to the signalling although crucially (and getting back on topic) this requires the belief that you are entitled to do so. I'm down on the notion of class in general personally. I think it's at best an incredibly lazy intellectual model of complex social phenomena. Basically I think there's no such thing [0], but I do very much enjoy listening to the things people say while they're explaining why I'm wrong about this. [0] Problematic for this theory is that people certainly believe there is and this has operational effects.
stevetrewick 10y ago
That doesn't much sound like the UK I live in. Would you mind expanding on that a bit?

alsetmusic 10y ago

I got it from my father, who rose from poor to wealthy through education. He taught me that education was all that mattered. When I achieved a prestigious Silicon Valley position after dropping out of college, I considered myself a fake who would be discovered at any moment for a long time. All my colleagues had compsci degrees. Thing is, I eventually discovered that I could hold my own. What my father taught me is only one way to achieve success, as I later realized. But that he taught it as dogma crippled me for a long time.

nsomaru 10y ago
There is a difference between 'having a degree' and 'being educated.' Maybe you did make it the way your dad showed you :)
- efaref 10y ago
  Hence the quote, "I never let my schooling get in the way of my education."

sangnoir 10y ago

> How is this trait acquired? It is acquired socially. The UK has a formalised class system dating back to the "divine right of kings". The "ruling elite" are rather literal as the membership of the upper house (House of Lords) is limited to hereditary peerage.

ricksplat 10y ago
But I mean day to day how's is this reinforced. Is there some kind of subtle bullying or gaslighting going on?
stevetrewick 10y ago
92 out of 813 seats are hereditary peers, the remainder are life peers [Edit: forgot the Bishops] appointed (technically) by the monarch on the advice of the government. There's really no such thing as a class 'system', let alone anything one could point to as being 'formal'. There is a bunch of in/out group signalling with fairly extreme geographic variations. Mobility across social boundaries can be achieved by understanding and adapting to the signalling although crucially (and getting back on topic) this requires the belief that you are entitled to do so. I'm down on the notion of class in general personally. I think it's at best an incredibly lazy intellectual model of complex social phenomena. Basically I think there's no such thing [0], but I do very much enjoy listening to the things people say while they're explaining why I'm wrong about this. [0] Problematic for this theory is that people certainly believe there is and this has operational effects.

stevetrewick 10y ago

That doesn't much sound like the UK I live in. Would you mind expanding on that a bit?