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"What possible reason is there to grow up? I see no benefit to it, for anyone." The reason would be a time horizon for your family that is greater than one (or
by rsync 10y ago
"What possible reason is there to grow up? I see no benefit to it, for anyone."
The reason would be a time horizon for your family that is greater than one (or zero) generations.
If your family, as a cohesive and architected entity, is just something that you do in your own lifespan for your own happiness or fulfillment, then there may indeed be no reason for you to "grow up". Perhaps a friendly, peer relationship to your children is a good model. It probably doesn't make much difference.
Speaking of your parents, they were probably caught in a weird no-mans-land between very traditional narratives of family planning and growth and our own very modern, dis-integrated narrative.
It may interest you to know that the longer you push out the arc of the timeline of your family, the more it becomes necessary to "behave like an adult". It may also interest you to know that no project could be as complex, intricate, risky and fulfilling as transforming a union between one man and one woman into a heirarchical, muti-generational enterprise.
Odds are very good that I will fail at this.
- anexprogrammer 10y agoHm. Interesting post, not a perspective I've seen in quite those terms before. Time horizon is that of the kids, and they've been priority, certainly until they get out of education. Only one is still to come of age, so friendly works, earlier it was more parental. Neither of us wanted to repeat our discipline first childhoods. You may be right, there was huge change in their lifetimes. The last part sounds more like building a dynasty. If the proceeds of a startup were in the bank perhaps, but I'd still hope to retain a sense of enjoyment for the kids and us! We'll get them through uni, leave a useful amount, but not anything worthy of family trust.