Many people seem to be saying don't get married because divorce is horrible. I believe that is the wrong focus. The horribleness comes from cleaving a long term

Many people seem to be saying don't get married because divorce is horrible. I believe that is the wrong focus. The horribleness comes from cleaving a long term relationship where your lives have become intertwined regardless of marital status. Without marriage, you still have child support, you still have to divide any joint assets and one or both sides will feel betrayed and taken advantage of. The main difference is when you are not married the division is governed by contract law rather than divorce law. Contract law will often leave the lower power/ lower earning spouse in MUCH worse shape. Historically that has been women (which is why they would push for marriage). But I see a reversing trend in my wife's family law practice where it is becoming more common for women to hold more power and income and are complaining just like the men used to about divorce outcomes.