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I don't know if I'd call it praiseworthy. I do think it's the sort of pragmatic immorality that a great many parents are happy to take on for the perceived bene

• tptacek 10y ago
  We all seem to have an enormous moral blind spot when it comes to our children competing with other children.
  • harryh 10y ago
    This is a tricky topic, but I wouldn't call it a moral blind spot per se. I think that we would have a problem with certain forms of unfair competition. You can't hire a smarter kid to take the SAT for your kid and expect others to feel ok about it. On the other hand, you are welcome to hire a tutor to help your kid score better on his own(1). I think that most people tend to think that parents have a responsibility to help their kids as much as they can within fairly wide constraints. Parent's loyalty to their children above the children of others is one of the fundamental building blocks of our society like it or not. 1. Though some studies seem to indicate this won't really help.
    • tptacek 10y ago
      It's hard to see a bright line where competition becomes unfair, but straightforwardly buying your own children into a better life than will be made available to children without means is problematic. This is a mountain range of slippery slopes, of course, but the fundamental moral point here seems pretty obvious.
      • harryh 10y ago
        I agree that there is no bright line here. Nor are there bright lines in many other areas of life where inequality rears its head. Is it fair that I can straightforwardly buy myself a better life than is available to others without means? Is this more or less unfair than than what I can buy for my child? If anything I would say that the personal luxuries I buy for myself are more unfair than the educational opportunities I can buy for my kid. At least the latter is in pursuit of human capital formation and not just luxury spending.
        • tptacek 10y ago
          I think there's a moral difference between what you do with the product of your achievements for yourself and what you do to impact the opportunity of the next generation. Which is essentially just a long way of saying that the moral weights on inequality and mobility/opportunity aren't the same.
          • harryh 10y ago
            I dunno. I hear what you are saying and I agree that lack of opportunity is a problem. I just have a hard time convincing myself that making sure my kid goes to a good school and gets a good education is morally fraught. Tough subject for sure.
            • tptacek 10y ago
              Like I said: I made sure my kids went to a decent school too (I drew the line at private school, but, like I said, my kids go to what is essential a de facto private school based on the neighborhood they live in). I'm not prepared to crucify people for making these kinds of moral compromises, but I think it's important not to go the other direction and valorize them.
  • wyager 10y ago
    Uh, yes? It is entirely reasonable to prioritize one's own children over the children of others. You're not required to be philanthropic all the time, especially not at the expense of your family.
  • Kalium 10y ago
    People tend to be very short-sighted about their children versus everyone else's. Tragedy of the commons readily results.