In defense of "How to win friends and influence people", its title makes it sound more manipulative than it is. (Relatedly, it may not be the book the original

In defense of "How to win friends and influence people", its title makes it sound more manipulative than it is. (Relatedly, it may not be the book the original poster is looking for.) Way back when I read it, I hadn't given thought to all the issues it addresses and it really opened my eyes. Maybe you can spot people that try to apply it as a tool "from a mile away" - however, I suspect it is a best seller because it has helped nudge lots of people towards having more positive interactions with others. I don't remember much phoney-ness in the book, although I could imagine phoney people applying its advice poorly.