8 ms·

Obviously not the same but I've had this happen in a couple places and I just say "FUCK OFF" as loud as I can and get visibly upset and they leave me alone afte

by bigdubs 10y ago

Obviously not the same but I've had this happen in a couple places and I just say "FUCK OFF" as loud as I can and get visibly upset and they leave me alone after that.

grecy 10y ago
....That's a horrible way to react. I wonder what these people think about you and your country of origin. You are, after all, an ambassador for your country when ever you are outside it.
- bigdubs 10y ago
  It's not my first reaction, it's not something I do when I'm traveling, but it's either be slightly loud and aggressive or just suffer in silence. I chose the former.
  - chrisan 10y ago
    Having just returned from a trip to England, whenever we were in touristy areas we saw a very high increase in the level of aggressiveness/pushiness while waiting in queues with certain foreign cultures. At first we suffered in silence, thinking "well that's just the way they behave in their country", but towards the end we were very direct and to their face when being rude to finally get them to stop.
- hoorayimhelping 10y ago
  >....That's a horrible way to react. Only if you operate under the assumption that they share your values. They may be accosting you because they see you as weak, and you may be representing your country or ethnicity poorly in their eyes.
- jm547ster 10y ago
  Mr everyone's hero
- timbowhite 10y ago
  Are you being serious? > I wonder what these people think about you If they're acting at all as GP described, then it's obvious they see you as another mark to aggressively try to extract money from. Caring about what some bothersome strangers think about you and where you're from takes a distant backseat to standing up to aggression.
  - grecy 10y ago
    > Are you being serious? I am. I'm the guy who wrote the story, maybe I did a bad job. It's not like they're getting violent or "trying to extract money from me" - jeez, when you do buy something you can just hold out a handful of money and they'll take the right amount - extremely, extremely honest. In reality, they're just trying to sell their stuff, I don't understand why someone would react by yelling and getting angry.
    - timbowhite 10y ago
      Hmm different strokes I suppose, but I'd definitely interpret that behavior as aggression. Out of curiosity, if they weren't trying to sell you anything, but were behaving like that (hissing/kissing/blocking your path), do you think getting angry would then be an appropriate response?
    - CapitalistCartr 10y ago
      Because it works. Its simply experimenting with different reactions until achieving the desired effect. I want to communicate disinterest in buying from street vendors. I try various forms/styles of communication until I accomplish my goal. I've had this problem in the USA, and merely looking unfriendly is often sufficient. In your situation, that's clearly inadequate.
      - enraged_camel 10y ago
        >>Because it works. So does spam. That's why spammers keep sending it. Does that mean it's OK? Clearly not.
- bigtunacan 10y ago
  This response just shows you are unfamiliar with these types of encounters or at the very least accepted behavior in such situations. In one area I used to live in the general "proper" behavior when you are approached by street vendors or beggars was essentially 3 phase. 1) Ignore unless you intend to buy or give. This means you do not reply to anything they say or even make eye contact. 2) Engage verbally or even just visually. This means you intend to buy or give. Now you will be pressured and given an aggressive sell/ask. 3) If it was a mistaken engagement or you don't reach an agreement you MUST aggressively exit. This often means yelling, possibly swearing, and in some cases even putting your hands on someone and even verbally threatening in bad situations. I spent a significant enough amount of my childhood growing up in this type of culture. My wife was always from a small city. When we later moved I explained to her that this was a big cultural difference than she was used to and the expected way to behave in these situations. Being from a small city she thought this was disrespectful and continually made things, putting it lightly, more difficult for us. Eventually it actually put us in a situation that escalated to being dangerous. A seller that she responded to with small talk became very angry that she had wasted his time. He then got in her face, put a hand on her shoulder and started screaming at her. At that point I ran over, pushed the man off of her and said, "She doesn't fucking want anything. Now get the fuck out of our faces before I have to kick your ass." After that happened she finally took my advice.
  - pavel_lishin 10y ago
    Where did you grow up where that's the norm? It sounds, uh, interesting.
    - mixmastamyk 10y ago
      It's quite common across the "third world," sorry can't think up a better term right now. But I've encountered very aggressive touts from India to Bahia, Brazil.
- craigsmansion 10y ago
  Well, for some countries being an ambassador actually means being a rude, obnoxious asshole. They're just doing their duty and sharing their cultural values.
- deleted 10y ago
  [deleted]
- imjustsaying 10y ago
  This is dangerous advice. There's been times where I've had hawkers and hasslers continually pester me, where I would ignore them or politely decline while walking away, yet they would begin touching me or continually follow me, leading to attempted pickpocketing, robbery, and sexual assault. Some will touch you on the shoulder, others will maintain some distance and continually get closer to you only to make a swipe at your pocket then try to run away with your cell phone or wallet (happened to me twice). One trinket-selling "monk" followed me into a building and grabbed me, but I managed to get back outside. Another person followed me into three different public bathrooms, which I kept having to exit after he continually followed me and went to the urinal next to me so he could look over at my penis. Eventually he stopped only after I walked by a security guard and yelled about what he was doing. It is 100% OK to yell at any hustler whom you are walking away from but is still following you. Not doing so was always how the aforementioned scenarios began. They know your vulnerability is your politeness, your "ambassador" mentality. Don't remain vulnerable when they cross the line and keep following you.
- 35bge57dtjku 10y ago
  You sound like you clearly have no basis for offering this questionable advice, to put it very politely.
adekok 10y ago
I've done the same with similar people in Europe. If they don't understand a polite but firm "No", and keep bugging me, then a firm "FUCK OFF" is what they deserve. Oddly, I've never had any animosity returned. Just a shrug of "Oh well, I tried".
deleted 10y ago
[deleted]

by bigdubs 10y ago

Obviously not the same but I've had this happen in a couple places and I just say "FUCK OFF" as loud as I can and get visibly upset and they leave me alone after that.

grecy 10y ago

....That's a horrible way to react. I wonder what these people think about you and your country of origin. You are, after all, an ambassador for your country when ever you are outside it.

bigdubs 10y ago
It's not my first reaction, it's not something I do when I'm traveling, but it's either be slightly loud and aggressive or just suffer in silence. I chose the former.
- chrisan 10y ago
  Having just returned from a trip to England, whenever we were in touristy areas we saw a very high increase in the level of aggressiveness/pushiness while waiting in queues with certain foreign cultures. At first we suffered in silence, thinking "well that's just the way they behave in their country", but towards the end we were very direct and to their face when being rude to finally get them to stop.
hoorayimhelping 10y ago
>....That's a horrible way to react. Only if you operate under the assumption that they share your values. They may be accosting you because they see you as weak, and you may be representing your country or ethnicity poorly in their eyes.
jm547ster 10y ago
Mr everyone's hero
timbowhite 10y ago
Are you being serious? > I wonder what these people think about you If they're acting at all as GP described, then it's obvious they see you as another mark to aggressively try to extract money from. Caring about what some bothersome strangers think about you and where you're from takes a distant backseat to standing up to aggression.
- grecy 10y ago
  > Are you being serious? I am. I'm the guy who wrote the story, maybe I did a bad job. It's not like they're getting violent or "trying to extract money from me" - jeez, when you do buy something you can just hold out a handful of money and they'll take the right amount - extremely, extremely honest. In reality, they're just trying to sell their stuff, I don't understand why someone would react by yelling and getting angry.
  - timbowhite 10y ago
    Hmm different strokes I suppose, but I'd definitely interpret that behavior as aggression. Out of curiosity, if they weren't trying to sell you anything, but were behaving like that (hissing/kissing/blocking your path), do you think getting angry would then be an appropriate response?
  - CapitalistCartr 10y ago
    Because it works. Its simply experimenting with different reactions until achieving the desired effect. I want to communicate disinterest in buying from street vendors. I try various forms/styles of communication until I accomplish my goal. I've had this problem in the USA, and merely looking unfriendly is often sufficient. In your situation, that's clearly inadequate.
    - enraged_camel 10y ago
      >>Because it works. So does spam. That's why spammers keep sending it. Does that mean it's OK? Clearly not.
bigtunacan 10y ago
This response just shows you are unfamiliar with these types of encounters or at the very least accepted behavior in such situations. In one area I used to live in the general "proper" behavior when you are approached by street vendors or beggars was essentially 3 phase. 1) Ignore unless you intend to buy or give. This means you do not reply to anything they say or even make eye contact. 2) Engage verbally or even just visually. This means you intend to buy or give. Now you will be pressured and given an aggressive sell/ask. 3) If it was a mistaken engagement or you don't reach an agreement you MUST aggressively exit. This often means yelling, possibly swearing, and in some cases even putting your hands on someone and even verbally threatening in bad situations. I spent a significant enough amount of my childhood growing up in this type of culture. My wife was always from a small city. When we later moved I explained to her that this was a big cultural difference than she was used to and the expected way to behave in these situations. Being from a small city she thought this was disrespectful and continually made things, putting it lightly, more difficult for us. Eventually it actually put us in a situation that escalated to being dangerous. A seller that she responded to with small talk became very angry that she had wasted his time. He then got in her face, put a hand on her shoulder and started screaming at her. At that point I ran over, pushed the man off of her and said, "She doesn't fucking want anything. Now get the fuck out of our faces before I have to kick your ass." After that happened she finally took my advice.
- pavel_lishin 10y ago
  Where did you grow up where that's the norm? It sounds, uh, interesting.
  - mixmastamyk 10y ago
    It's quite common across the "third world," sorry can't think up a better term right now. But I've encountered very aggressive touts from India to Bahia, Brazil.
craigsmansion 10y ago
Well, for some countries being an ambassador actually means being a rude, obnoxious asshole. They're just doing their duty and sharing their cultural values.
deleted 10y ago
[deleted]
imjustsaying 10y ago
This is dangerous advice. There's been times where I've had hawkers and hasslers continually pester me, where I would ignore them or politely decline while walking away, yet they would begin touching me or continually follow me, leading to attempted pickpocketing, robbery, and sexual assault. Some will touch you on the shoulder, others will maintain some distance and continually get closer to you only to make a swipe at your pocket then try to run away with your cell phone or wallet (happened to me twice). One trinket-selling "monk" followed me into a building and grabbed me, but I managed to get back outside. Another person followed me into three different public bathrooms, which I kept having to exit after he continually followed me and went to the urinal next to me so he could look over at my penis. Eventually he stopped only after I walked by a security guard and yelled about what he was doing. It is 100% OK to yell at any hustler whom you are walking away from but is still following you. Not doing so was always how the aforementioned scenarios began. They know your vulnerability is your politeness, your "ambassador" mentality. Don't remain vulnerable when they cross the line and keep following you.
35bge57dtjku 10y ago
You sound like you clearly have no basis for offering this questionable advice, to put it very politely.

adekok 10y ago

I've done the same with similar people in Europe. If they don't understand a polite but firm "No", and keep bugging me, then a firm "FUCK OFF" is what they deserve. Oddly, I've never had any animosity returned. Just a shrug of "Oh well, I tried".

deleted 10y ago

[deleted]