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It seems that you're really afraid of socializing. Think of it this way, when you are in your death bed, waiting for the die(), none of these constraints you pu
by truth_sentinell 10y ago
It seems that you're really afraid of socializing. Think of it this way, when you are in your death bed, waiting for the die(), none of these constraints you put yourself through would matter, won't even matter if you weared the shirt. But the way I see it, there are two possible outcomes in these kind of situations where you hesitate to do something for whatever reason :either you do it or you don't, in the future it won't matter what outcome you chosed, so I'll get the doing, because it will probably be another story to tell.
- marmot777 10y agoYes, you're absolutely right. I can even understand that intellectually. Doesn't help, unfortunately. Though if I got in the habit of wearing a crazy costume and did other crazy stuff like leaving the house, all my hang-ups would work themselves out.
- truth_sentinell 10y agoI understand, because I've felt at times the same way you do, so I figured what I said above in order to "hack my brain". Doesn't matter what if I say to you the absolute truth, I think the real change comes from within. The first step is always the hardest, but after you take it, surprinsingly and for your joy, everything will fall into place. I don't know if this happens to you, but I was always wondering what would people think of me in certain situations, for example talking on my phone in public (where everybody can hear what I say), or wearing a sight-seeker shirt or something along those lines. That really hold me down to do things. So I also figured, most people don't give a shit, and if they comment about it, 10 min later they would have already forgotten. And of top of that, chances are you'll never see them again in your lifetime. That helped me destroy these irrational thoughts I don't even know where the hell I got them on the first place.
- meowface 10y agoI have very little anxiety about doing or wearing something embarrassing in public. The vast majority are strangers I'll never see again. I won't remember them and they won't remember me. And even if they do remember me, I don't care at all, because I can't be confronted with that in the future. But I have a ton of anxiety about doing or wearing something embarrassing in front of people I have to work with or talk to on a daily basis. So, for the most part I keep my mouth shut unless spoken to, and just try to copy what other people wear. That way I'm mostly known as the quiet or shy person rather than the bizarre, awkward fellow. Inevitably I'll eventually acquire all of those labels if someone is around me enough, but at least I can make "quiet" outweigh "bizarre" nine times out of ten.
- marmot777 10y agoIt's more like if you're noticed by a stranger approving or disapproving, it's forgotten in seconds most likely, never making it into to storage even. What the heck, I was trying to google disapproving (spelling) and got disapproving cat. Is that a thing? Never mind, off topic. My point, you're right.
- marmot777 10y agoI can always get a life later is my philosophy. I've got more interesting stuff to work on now or play with now. Yeah, Ok.