I want Jarvis, literally the AI in the Iron Man movie. I want him to converse banter and operate my computers / servers with whatever I need, and do it FAST.

I want Jarvis, literally the AI in the Iron Man movie. I want him to converse banter and operate my computers / servers with whatever I need, and do it FAST. Siri and Google are doing good things, but I want something I can host myself so its quick, responsive and feels like i'm talking to a real person.