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An easier strategy for giving up Facebook is to simply unfollow most of your friends for about two or three weeks. After a while, you will probably notice a hug
by cmstoken 10y ago
An easier strategy for giving up Facebook is to simply unfollow most of your friends for about two or three weeks. After a while, you will probably notice a huge decrease in your cravings. Once you feel comfortable not seeing updates from everyone all the time, you can try deactivating your account for a week or two, and overtime you start feeling like you don't actually need to use Facebook anymore. You certainly don't have to delete your account or unfriend everyone to do this.
- marmot777 10y agoWhat is the reason for doing this though? I don't feel the need to do this. It feels like a solution looking for a problem. I realize Facebook takes up time but I usually have fun on Facebook. But I probably use it to make up for weaknesses and to avoid being alone with my thoughts at times.
- cmstoken 10y agoInteresting. If you actually enjoy being on Facebook there is no reason to do this. It's only going to help if you're trying to give it up like you did with Twitter. My suggestion is a less radical alternative to the common "delete your Facebook account" mantra that you mentioned.
- marmot777 10y agoYes, that's right. I'm realizing that the problem the OP brings up is really a spectrum. I actually do think I have a problem with too much time online but everyone's solution isn't drastic measures. For some it might be scheduling yoga, the gym, a beer with friends. You know you have a problem when you're grateful when a friend cancels plans as you get to spend more time online. One thing is clear though, immersion without awareness is inherently unhealthy. The first step toward finding one's way is awareness or a reminder of the awareness you once had.
- kodt 10y agoHow many people on your Facebook friends list, or more specifically who show up on your feed have you not talked to in over a year? In over 5 years? For me I would say 90% of people on my feed I have not spoken with in over a year or two. Some not for 5 years, some not for 10 years. So the question is, is it really worth my time to read updates on their life when neither of us can be bothered nor have reason to actually talk to each other? Be it in person, or over the phone, or a personal e-mail. I think for many people, they spend way too much time reading about other people's lives. People who they no longer see or interact with in any way outside of Facebook. The other ill effect is that most people only tend to post positive things on Facebook. If you don't talk with them outside of Facebook you are getting a one sided view of their life. Everything may seem perfect. They love their job. They keep going on interesting vacations. Getting nice things. Going out to eat etc.. And it can make you depressed that your own life isn't as fun or interesting. The truth is they likely have just as many bad days and hardships as you, but don't publicize that information. A one sided view can cause jealousy and resentment. If Facebook is your only window in their life, you probably shouldn't be concerning yourself with what these people are doing.
- marmot777 10y agoYou make valid points. But I'll still make a feeble attempt to defend Facebook. Speaking for myself, I've had some interesting and fun conversations on Facebook and even met new people that became friends in real life. I don't pay much attention to the check out how wonderful my life is posts and more attention to something that seems more genuine, is interesting, or the basis for some banter. I actually enjoy seeing pictures of people's families and they seem to enjoy when I post pictures of my son but I don't do that very often. I've already accounted for the positive bias on Facebook so it does not affect my view of the world. I'd imagine most people who've survived on Facebook this long have done the same, not to mention I think the nature of posts has gotten beyond the burnishing one's image to more balanced life challenges sort of posts. I'm talking about my feed so others might not be seeing this trend but it's possible a lot of people have said fuck it I'm going to tell the truth on here. I am friends on Facebook with close friends and family but yes a lot of my "friends" are a hodgepodge of people I met once, met online somehow, and some I don't even remember where they came from. So the net result is a sort of fantasy community. I'm not sure there's anything wrong with a fantasy community though as I experience it as real. I'm not sure if that's a contradiction but I'd better get off HN for the rest of the day as this is topic is consuming. :-)