5 ms·

She held out a plate to me, which I shyly refused. Go on, she urged me. "Food is never food unless you share it with others, no?" she said. I accepted and found

by whack 10y ago

She held out a plate to me, which I shyly refused. Go on, she urged me. "Food is never food unless you share it with others, no?" she said. I accepted and found love at first bite. I also remember a hearty Punjabi woman we met on another trip. She sighed at my mother's humble offering of idlis. "I can never make such soft idlis at home," she said, as I bit into her fragrant alu paratha (a flaky, potato-stuffed Indian bread), wondering why anyone who could eat such manna every day would ever want an idli. These food exchanges would invariably extend into detailed introductions, exchange of family histories, discovery of common acquaintances, all culminating in a boisterous game of cards or round of antakshari (contest of Hindi movie songs) and a final promise to keep in touch. There's something very beautiful about complete strangers interacting and engaging deeply with one another, free of any selfish desires besides that of companionship. There are many things I love about today's world, but that sense of camaraderie does seem diminished these days.

witty_username 10y ago
> sense of camaraderie does seem diminished these days Why do you think this?
- netsharc 10y ago
  To pick an easy target, smartphones mean you can travel for 3 months and still talk to your hometown friend every 5 minutes. Everyone is sharing their moments with their e-friends, instead of with others actually living that moment too.
  - witty_username 10y ago
    How is using a smartphone not actually living?
- deleted 10y ago
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- deleted 10y ago
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- dominotw 10y ago
  Well in rich countries you have govt to take care of you when something goes wrong. In countries like India you have to depend on the magnanimity of strangers, so its in you best interest to make friends. our professions and interests have diversified a lot over past couple of decades so the chances of running into a stranger who has similar interests to yours are lower. This one is prbly just me, I am afraid of talking to women and be accused of sexual harassment which these days can be just spreading your legs too wide. I am not saying ppl necessarily do this consciously at an individual level but talking about culture as whole.
estreeper 10y ago
We visited India last summer. We had been warned by other travelers, blogs, and even the Indian Railways employees, that we should stay with the higher class cars. When getting tickets from Agra (where the Taj Mahal is) to go north, they were one short for our group, so I volunteered to stay by myself in the lower (sleeper) class. We got on the train around midnight, and I stumbled around looking for my berth. Everyone was asleep. An IR employee, who was genuinely happy that I was there, helped me find the spot. I was paranoid and alone in a train car filled with strangers. The next morning, I felt like a fool for feeling that way. I awoke to find my 5 other cabin-mates sitting around the small central table, quietly talking so as not to disturb me. Suddenly we were all talking, even though I spoke almost no Hindi and they spoke almost no English, and they were all feeding me delicious home-cooked food that was unlike anything I had ever had. That experience was a demonstration of the power of technology to connect people in unexpected ways as well - we were showing each other maps of our home towns, pictures of my family and city, and translating hindi words on a smartphone as we made our way through rural India. One of my favorite experiences of the trip only happened because I couldn't get the ticket I wanted. I think it's easy today to live in our own walled gardens, and being so connected means we don't need to move outside of them often - we'll just see our friends' posts, watch the stuff in our Netflix queues, and read the articles that we agree with. But, I still believe that sense of camaraderie with strangers is still there, based if nothing else on the fact that so many people crave it. We just have to move outside of our comfort zones and find it.
- sliverstorm 10y ago
  It's worth considering why you were advised to stay in the higher class cars. It could be classism and segregation, or there could be a higher incidence of theft and you got lucky. Or who knows.
  - AlphaSite 10y ago
    In my experience, toilets are an important consideration.
    - 10y ago

by whack 10y ago

witty_username 10y ago

> sense of camaraderie does seem diminished these days Why do you think this?

netsharc 10y ago
To pick an easy target, smartphones mean you can travel for 3 months and still talk to your hometown friend every 5 minutes. Everyone is sharing their moments with their e-friends, instead of with others actually living that moment too.
- witty_username 10y ago
  How is using a smartphone not actually living?
deleted 10y ago
[deleted]
deleted 10y ago
[deleted]
dominotw 10y ago
Well in rich countries you have govt to take care of you when something goes wrong. In countries like India you have to depend on the magnanimity of strangers, so its in you best interest to make friends. our professions and interests have diversified a lot over past couple of decades so the chances of running into a stranger who has similar interests to yours are lower. This one is prbly just me, I am afraid of talking to women and be accused of sexual harassment which these days can be just spreading your legs too wide. I am not saying ppl necessarily do this consciously at an individual level but talking about culture as whole.

estreeper 10y ago

We visited India last summer. We had been warned by other travelers, blogs, and even the Indian Railways employees, that we should stay with the higher class cars. When getting tickets from Agra (where the Taj Mahal is) to go north, they were one short for our group, so I volunteered to stay by myself in the lower (sleeper) class. We got on the train around midnight, and I stumbled around looking for my berth. Everyone was asleep. An IR employee, who was genuinely happy that I was there, helped me find the spot. I was paranoid and alone in a train car filled with strangers. The next morning, I felt like a fool for feeling that way. I awoke to find my 5 other cabin-mates sitting around the small central table, quietly talking so as not to disturb me. Suddenly we were all talking, even though I spoke almost no Hindi and they spoke almost no English, and they were all feeding me delicious home-cooked food that was unlike anything I had ever had. That experience was a demonstration of the power of technology to connect people in unexpected ways as well - we were showing each other maps of our home towns, pictures of my family and city, and translating hindi words on a smartphone as we made our way through rural India. One of my favorite experiences of the trip only happened because I couldn't get the ticket I wanted. I think it's easy today to live in our own walled gardens, and being so connected means we don't need to move outside of them often - we'll just see our friends' posts, watch the stuff in our Netflix queues, and read the articles that we agree with. But, I still believe that sense of camaraderie with strangers is still there, based if nothing else on the fact that so many people crave it. We just have to move outside of our comfort zones and find it.

sliverstorm 10y ago
It's worth considering why you were advised to stay in the higher class cars. It could be classism and segregation, or there could be a higher incidence of theft and you got lucky. Or who knows.
- AlphaSite 10y ago
  In my experience, toilets are an important consideration.
  - 10y ago