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It's almost hard to read the comments on here. "It's a stressful environment---people have to blow off steam." "Is X comment really that offensive?" "Joking
by daughart 10y ago
It's almost hard to read the comments on here.
"It's a stressful environment---people have to blow off steam."
"Is X comment really that offensive?"
"Joking around is important to office culture."
"The real damage is punishing people who said the offensive thing when he/she didn't mean anything by it."
It's really not that complicated. Act professionally at work. Working at a job isn't easy, but part of the responsibility of work is to _act_ professionally, and delivering genius code doesn't give anyone a pass to act unprofessionally. When you feel an impulse to talk or joke about physical appearance, politics, religion, sex, gender, rape, racial issues, nationality/ethnicity, etc., just hold your tongue! Or write it in a little book and save it for when you're at the bar with friends. If you do say something, and inevitably get that little "I shouldn't have said that" prickle in the back of your brain---simply immediately apologize and move on! If you don't get that prickle, and a co-worker or manager says something, just take it at face value that what you said was not professional, because professional actions never raise the possibility of personal offense. That is the bare minimum you are required to do.
If you're a little more social justice oriented, you might even become aware of the ways women and minorities are treated unfairly, and take special actions to fix this. Take notice the next time you're in YAAMM -- "yet another all male meeting" -- and think about whether there are any women who could contribute but were not invited. If you hear a good idea, give credit to the originator when you repeat it. It's actually not that hard.
- deleted 10y ago[deleted]
- forgottenpass 10y agoWhen you feel an impulse to talk or joke about physical appearance, politics, religion, sex, gender, rape, racial issues, nationality/ethnicity, etc., just hold your tongue! Going to such extremes to guarantee never offending anyone is a great way to wind up unhappy and alone at work. It's fine if that's what you want - when I don't like talking to my coworkers in the first place I happily implement that strategy. Chances are that anyone using that strategy and isn't also miserable has a fair number of unspoken assumptions about acceptable behavior, and isn't actually using that strategy. They're just slightly more guarded than in their normal behavior.
- daughart 10y agoDon't see how it's going to extremes. I sit at a table with 6 others and manage a team of 8, have followed this for years and enjoy constant conversations and have good relationships with all my co-workers. Maybe I just have a richer personal life than others, and have plenty of other things to talk about?
- MrLeftHand 10y agoOK, sorry but this part... This was such a self-promoting bs. Richer life then others? You can't be serious! This is literally offensive to others. You just contradicted yourself right here. Good job!
- mwfunk 10y agoAs crazy as it sounds, yes, it's possible to have positive interactions in professional settings without making jokes about people's race/religion/gender/appearance/etc. That's not being PC, that's literally just being a grown-up.
- MrLeftHand 10y agoOh god, being a grownup. Yeah because grownups are immaculate. They never do or say anything stupid. If this were true we would live in a perfect world and we couldn't make any rape jokes, because rape as a crime wouldn't exist in the first place. From the article, who was the grown-up? The guy making a mistake by telling the rape joke and apologizing afterwords, or the lady who literally had a rage fit about the whole situation and ran directly to Tim Cook and because she didn't got her way left the company? So tell me then? Who was the grownup? And the comment I replied to? @daughart bragging about having a richer life and acting with a 'holier than thou' attitude? Literally being offensive! And lecturing us about how not to be offensive in an office environment? Really? I bet this is a fun person on parties. Also I would love to talk to that team of 8. Just asking them how fun it is to work together with a person like this.
- forgottenpass 10y ago