I'm pretty terrified if there are men who only have shallow friendships like in the poker night example. It's true that probably only men are capable of such re

I'm pretty terrified if there are men who only have shallow friendships like in the poker night example. It's true that probably only men are capable of such relationships, though. Yes, I have those shallow friendships too but their purpose is to have fun. We talk about computers, photography, cars, stuff like that, and usually while doing something. However, if those were all I had I would feel really lonely. For me, it's absolutely essential to have few (male) friends who are close and with whom I can talk about and reflect my life. I share things with my wife too but you can't share everything with one close person and you shouldn't. A wife equals not an amateur friend therapist. You might want to mention your fears and problems to her but you don't want to dwell in them with her. I have a feminine side like every person, male or female, and I think it's hugely valuable to have a male guy or two who can respond to that, too. The feminine side is a much smaller part of me than my masculine side but it's still there and if I were to only acknowledge the latter, I would be missing quite a lot in life. Life can rarely be solved, in the masculine problem-solving way; you can only live it. Pretty much all you can "solve" in your life is change your attitude, and in order to do that you have to recognize and acknowledge what part of you feels bad. Talking helps in that; in fact, trying to consider it a solvable problem and fix myself would only drive me further from the change I'm eventually going after. But I sure like going karting racing with my friends or having beers and a few good problems to solve: that's fun! I just also acknowledge that it's only one part of me.