6 ms·

Ask HN: Office merge. They have a pet policy. I'm scared of dogs. What can I do?

• aaronbrethorst 10y ago
  Get proper documentation of the phobia from an appropriately licensed medical practitioner. a) It'll be a good first step towards resolution of the phobia itself, and b) you'll probably need it for making your case in the office.
• partisan 10y ago
  I'm all for freedoms until they infringe on the freedoms of others. You shouldn't have to go to work in a place where you don't feel comfortable. Raise the issue. Any responsible and reasonable employer would either nix the policy or find a way to accommodate your situation in some way.
  • Torgo 10y ago
    Having a phobia is by definition not reasonable.
    • delecti 10y ago
      That's true, but accommodating a phobia very well could be. It's not like OP has a phobia of keyboards.
      • Torgo 10y ago
        I personally would draw the line at compelling other people's behavior, assuming it was not intentionally antagonistic.
        • delecti 10y ago
          I disagree. I think there are examples of compelling other people's behavior that can be reasonable accommodations. Providing a dog-free space (not necessarily the entire workplace) is reasonable. On the other hand, completely eliminating dogs from the company policy for one employee would not be reasonable.
    • DanBC 10y ago
      Dislike of dogs is also partly cultural.
  • coldnose 10y ago
    I'm uncomfortable around (and supremely irritated by) human babies, but it's pretty common to let people bring their awful babies into an office. Those babies don't work here, and they have no business being here, but I guess human parents feel they have some legitimate reason to bring them to work. In a fair world, I don't see how dogs are any different.
    • Osiris 10y ago
      They bring them to work, set them in a bouncer, and then proceed to work the entire day while the baby is there? The most I've ever seen is a few minutes of someone bring in their child to show some co-workers before after heading out to lunch or home. If someone is bringing their baby in while they are working for the whole day, I think it would be reasonable to ask them to find child care options.
      • Tomte 10y ago
        Yes, I've only seen the same. Having children at the office for a work day isn't sensible. Except when it's actually provided for: At a large company I was interviewing at they showed us an open-floor office for employees whose babysitter was missing on that day (or a sick spouse or whatever). The employees could just grab their laptop, and take a desk in that office for a day. In front of all the desks was a glass wall. Behind it a kindergarten, so that the parents could see their child and the children were occupied.
    • partisan 10y ago
      I'll give you the same advice I gave the OP. Raise the issue. Any reasonable company would provide you with a suitable resolution.
    • tptacek 10y ago
      It's almost as if the rules for humans were different than those for dogs.
  • dota_fanatic 10y ago
    And yet open office plans are rampant despite ample evidence that they infringe on the freedoms of others (to get their work done). Seems like a much more reasonable thing to accommodate, no? Still, at many places, places of professional aspiration even, it is not. Hmmm.
  • ryandvm 10y ago
    Good thing he's not a racist...
• mtmail 10y ago
  What if you were allergic to pets? The employer has to find a solution to please both groups. Maybe you get a corner office.
  • criddell 10y ago
    And hope that people want you around the office more than the dogs.
• twunde 10y ago
  Usually most people bringing in dogs are very considerate and the dogs are usually very well behaved (certainly won't bite you). I would talk to HR, it's possible that they may have some way of helping you deal with it, possibly a section of the space where dogs aren't allowed.
  • ecspike 10y ago
    We have a dog policy at my work but you have to house the pet in a specified meeting room and only move it when in transit to walk the dog or leave. That also means that there's generally a limit of one dog at a time. We also had someone who loved dogs but was deathly allergic. Like everyone said, talk to HR. They will figure something out.
    • throwawaydog 10y ago
      Thanks, sounds like just bringing it up would be fine (and hopefully doesn't end up labling me a dog hater!). The whole pets policy seems crazy to me, what's to stop me bringing my SO to work because I enjoy her company. Do you think it's just convenient for the owner, or is there something behind letting people bring pets to work?
      • eschutte2 10y ago
        I think it's as simple as some people (like me) just enjoy having dogs around in an office. I doubt it's much more convenient for the owners, but I bet they like having their dogs around.
        • placeybordeaux 10y ago
          My dog has separation anxiety to the tune of trying to escape the house if I leave it for more than an hour. When people are around he generally will just lay down and sleep. It'd be mighty convenient to be able to bring him to work. Hopefully mine is an unusual case though.
      • Kaizyn 10y ago
• deleted 10y ago
  [deleted]
• pcunite 10y ago
  Pet owners always say, "Oh, he won't hurt anyone. Isn't he cute? Down fido! Down boy! He's just excited. Can I get you something to drink?" The trouble is that animals act differently when the owner is not around. If possible, spray apple juice on your clothing before you leave for work that day. The animal will bite you, but you won't see it again after that.
  • Normal_gaussian 10y ago
    This is horrible and immoral advice. Disagreeing, complaining, and litigating are one thing. Deliberately falsifying a situation is quite another. This is of course leaving aside the fact that the course of action you suggest could easily lead to a life being taken. It is impossible for me to courteously describe how appalled I am at your advice.
    • pcunite 10y ago
      Sigh ... it is humor.
      • delecti 10y ago
        Maybe an attempt at it.
    • ghers 10y ago
      How is a dog biting him falsification? Claiming that the dog bit him when it did not would be false, but if the dog bites him, the dog bit him. Unless the dog is huge, it's unlikely he'll die.
  • throwawaydog 10y ago
    This seems like pretty bad advice, considering my issue with dogs is feeling like I'm going to get bitten. Why would I bring that on myself on purpose.
    • TillE 10y ago
      Aggressive dogs are incredibly rare, especially if you're just ignoring them and not trying to interact. Here's what my city looks like: http://dogswaitinginberlin.tumblr.com/ http://dogswaitinginberlin.tumblr.com/ Unleashed dogs everywhere. Never heard of it being a problem.
• j28xfc5qsc 10y ago
  If you don't want to work around dogs, your employer should accommodate that. But it's also worth considering that it sounds like you have a phobia, and phobias are a curable condition. It would help you going forward if you weren't afraid of dogs. If getting bitten by a dog in the workplace was a significant risk, your employer's insurance would not allow them to put dogs in the workplace. A psychologist could help you with this issue, if you want help.
  • hartator 10y ago
    It can be that the person doesn't like dogs because it's kind of gross. Smell your hand after petting one. I like dogs though.
    • fletchowns 10y ago
      You have a very low threshold for what is considered gross. That's just the tip of the iceberg with pets! (and babies)
      • chris_7 10y ago
        Neither of those noisy (distracting) things belong in an office, though. Offices are a place for focus.
        • sliverstorm 10y ago
          Haven't had an office dog, but shop dogs are usually wonderful- sweet, quiet, unobtrusive, and pleasant to have around. Not all dogs are like that, of course
        • GFK_of_xmaspast 10y ago
          What's wrong with bringing a baby to the office?
          • xapata 10y ago
• bluedino 10y ago
  I had a job where it was okay to bring your dog in - my dog was well-behaved, more quiet and lazy than anything. She'd just sit under my desk the whole day, just like she would if we were at home. She'd get up and wander around if I went to use the bathroom or to the kitchen, and being 130lbs she would startle people. On the other hand, a co-worker would bring her dog in and the thing would non-stop run around the office, sliding into things, barking incessantly, knocking over and digging through trash cans...
  • vacri 10y ago
    At one office, the owner would visit and bring his old dog, which was deaf as a post and supremely uninterested in people. The dog would do the rounds of the office, and almost everyone would put their hands out to pat him... which the dog would ignore on his way to check out the employee's trash bin. Move on to the next bin to look for anything interesting, completely ignoring the friendly humans :)
• anilr 10y ago
  We have a pet policy at work. One dog at a time, it can't be a large dog, must be well behaved and... ... if anyone has a problem with the pet policy it may need to be canceled. It's fun having dogs at work, but it's pretty sensible for a company to place its employees before their pets. Raise your concern - it's not unusual to be uncomfortable around animals. If it's not a deathly fear though, I suggest trying to be open minded about it. Most of the dogs in our office pretty much sleep or stay near their owner 99% of the day. They only perk up when food is around or the UPS guy comes by ;)
• Osiris 10y ago
  I've found that generally my managers are pretty approachable and I've never had any fears of expressing concerns I have with them during my bi-weekly or monthly 1:1 sessions. If you're not having 1:1 sessions with your manager, you should be. It's a great way to nip issues in the bud before they become unmanageable.
• hubert123 10y ago
  there is nothing wrong with being afraid of strange dogs, just dont pet them or interact with them, turn away from them if they approach you. make clear that you dont want to interact with them on ur workplace, ppl will understand. yeah u will look like a partypooper. whatever
• goodside 10y ago
  If you dislike dogs that strongly, claim to have an allergy and politely ask the owners to keep them away from your desk. If that doesn't work, explain your allergies to management. It'll spark less resentment than the truth.
• qntty 10y ago
  I like dogs but I wouldn't want to work in an office with dogs running around. I would definitely ask for a dog free zone (at the very least) if it were me. You're definitely not wrong to be weirded out by it. Working outside on a farm with dogs is one thing, but offices are no place for animals that might have energy to burn by running around (imo). That being said, definitely consider meeting some nice dogs to convince yourself that they're not so scary. If you're feeling ambitious, go to a dog park and ask people if it's okay to pet their dog. Hold out the back of your hand to let it sniff you before you pet it, and move toward it slowly to gauge it's level of comfort. These little fears are worth taking the time to overcome.
• bhhaskin 10y ago
  The thing I think everyone is missing is that it isn't their employer who has the policy. It is the other business in the same office space. I would still talk to HR about it, but it might not be up to that employer if dogs are allowed or not (except to find another office space).
• rdtsc 10y ago
  Don't know the reason for OP's dislike of dogs, but in some countries there are stray dogs running around, and they will attack people sometimes, especially children. It happened to my cousin. His mom (my aunt) mentions that he started stuttering after that. And he is still very much afraid of dogs. People back there undertand that fear. Here in US, it is more "Oh, don't be afraid of Fluffy, he's fine, just pet him". Telling them someone is afraid of them is just inviting ridicule. A co-worker I knew was just telling people he is alergic. He was from India, and figured we Americans understand alergies pretty well, so he said that explanation worked better than explaining his phobia.
• DougN7 10y ago
  My wife used to be petrified of dogs, no exageration - she would freeze up. But she didn't want to pass that on to our kids so we got a dog. She will now never live without two dogs. You don't know it yet, but dogs are, with almost no exceptions, wonderful, loving beings. All they want to do is be part of your pack and make you happy, and get love back. This sounds like a great opportunity for you. Pick one dog. Learn it's name. Say hi to it. Pet it. It won't take long if you get to see it regularly. You be forever grateful you did.
• ivanhoe 10y ago
  Why not challenge your fears instead? I used to have a terrible fear of heights. Then I've got a really interesting job offer, but the office was on a high floor with really huge windows. For me that was a total horror, but I've got really pissed on myself for being so weak and in the moment of craziness I've took the job anyway. And the first few days were a real struggle to stay functional, I would use any excuse to go into the corridor just to come down a bit. But very quickly I just stopped paying attention. You just get used to it and you relax and all of the sudden the fear is gone. So I started pushing myself more and eventually I've now got to the point that I'm totally ok with heights, no discomfort anymore at all (I even did some paragliding lessons recently). That's the only way to overcome the phobias, to challenge them. And it really works, just take your time and do it step by step, on your own pace.
• GFK_of_xmaspast 10y ago
  How do you feel about assistance and service dogs.
• maxharris 10y ago
  Why not try to learn to like dogs? In the past, I have generally disliked pets. However, my wife really wants a dog. So over the years I've grown to dislike them less and less, to the point where they now generally make me smile. They might make you uncomfortable now, but it doesn't have to be that way if you try. (Oh, and by the way, I'm incredibly allergic to dogs and cats. But I get around this by washing my hands after touching them. I've also been told that there are shots you can get that will cure pet allergies such as these.)
• yoav 10y ago
  1) Tell your employer about the problem. But don't accept any 'outs' from confronting your fear. Present it as an opportunity to overcome this phobia. 2) Get this book, or one like it (https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0195311353/ https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0195311353/) CBT is a powerful way to rewire your brain, so "dog = fear" will be a thing of the past in a few weeks of practice. There probably isn't a safer place to practice exposures since people don't bring unfriendly dogs to work, and you can see the dogs interact with people before you practice exposure and pick ones that are smaller/friendlier/calmer/safer-feeling to start with.
• sfrailsdev 10y ago
  So I am going to try to answer your question. I think it's a perfectly reasonable thing to bring up, in a "Hi I understand that the other office allows dog owners to bring their pets in. I'm really uncomfortable around dogs, you might say I have a phobia. Could we discuss whether to continue that policy, or if that decision has already been made, would it be reasonable to ask that the dogs be kept to a specific part of the office?