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I definitely use the "would I enjoy getting drinks" bar and I feel it's perfectly valid though - I'll admit - poorly worded. It really has nothing to do with ac

I definitely use the "would I enjoy getting drinks" bar and I feel it's perfectly valid though - I'll admit - poorly worded. It really has nothing to do with actually wanting to get drinks with the person (I'd at least like to pretend I have a social life outside of work) but rather being perfectly comfortable talking with the person regardless of the social situation. Yeah, if you can do your work with minimal supervision that's gravy and stuff... but if I don't enjoy talking to you that's a huge communication red flag for me. And perhaps that's a communication flaw with me not being able to flawlessly interface with all human beings - but I'd much rather be working with the people I can level with regardless of the topic. Fortunately, most of my roles are of the "engineer" and individual contributor variety so my opinions on potential hires are often supplemental anecdotes rather than actual decisions.

eropple 10y ago
Being able to "level with someone" who is not like you is a learnable skill. Given the studied and demonstrable bias towards cultural (human culture, not "tech culture"), racial, and gender similarity when selecting for fit, not doing so, and contributing to continued disparities and injustices within this industry and society at large, is immoral and unethical and you should stop. And it's foolish besides. You would "enjoy" talking to me, so long as I cared to play the game you want to play. There's no reason for that to continue once I've got the job (though at this point in my career I don't need to play your as monkey). The third rail in these discussions is that, in tech, it is very likely that I also look like you and it is very likely that I speak similarly enough to you. I get a free pass for a lot of things from that. My lack of "culture fit" is by choice, because I think tech culture is a tire fire of gross mentalities and I don't mind criticizing it. Others have an uphill slog that is not of their choice.
- deleted 10y ago
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- seangrogg 10y ago
  I know it's a learnable skill, but being relatively laid back, easy-going, and generally amicable I don't feel a particularly strong need to further advance it in light of diminishing returns over unit time compared to other skills. As a brown liberal-republican with a military background and an education in psychology I am definitely just like every other techie in the Bay Area, of course, and I should stop leveraging my background because I'm obviously part of your unethical and immoral bell curve. I guess. I fail to see how it's my fault if you play mind games to get into my good graces. Most people adapt their persona to their situation in the first place - it's common to be a "different person" when you're with your family, your friends, and your coworkers. And given most of these positions are contractual... I guess it depends on how long you're looking for a job. I tend to be pretty ability-driven in my decision making process and rarely dismiss a person entirely because I don't "want to have drinks". But if they're not a personable individual maybe it's not me who has to do the growing for them, eh?

eropple 10y ago

Being able to "level with someone" who is not like you is a learnable skill. Given the studied and demonstrable bias towards cultural (human culture, not "tech culture"), racial, and gender similarity when selecting for fit, not doing so, and contributing to continued disparities and injustices within this industry and society at large, is immoral and unethical and you should stop. And it's foolish besides. You would "enjoy" talking to me, so long as I cared to play the game you want to play. There's no reason for that to continue once I've got the job (though at this point in my career I don't need to play your as monkey). The third rail in these discussions is that, in tech, it is very likely that I also look like you and it is very likely that I speak similarly enough to you. I get a free pass for a lot of things from that. My lack of "culture fit" is by choice, because I think tech culture is a tire fire of gross mentalities and I don't mind criticizing it. Others have an uphill slog that is not of their choice.

deleted 10y ago
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seangrogg 10y ago
I know it's a learnable skill, but being relatively laid back, easy-going, and generally amicable I don't feel a particularly strong need to further advance it in light of diminishing returns over unit time compared to other skills. As a brown liberal-republican with a military background and an education in psychology I am definitely just like every other techie in the Bay Area, of course, and I should stop leveraging my background because I'm obviously part of your unethical and immoral bell curve. I guess. I fail to see how it's my fault if you play mind games to get into my good graces. Most people adapt their persona to their situation in the first place - it's common to be a "different person" when you're with your family, your friends, and your coworkers. And given most of these positions are contractual... I guess it depends on how long you're looking for a job. I tend to be pretty ability-driven in my decision making process and rarely dismiss a person entirely because I don't "want to have drinks". But if they're not a personable individual maybe it's not me who has to do the growing for them, eh?