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>Loneliness - the emotion of being disconnected. You feel physical pain in your intestines and chest when you see others enjoying themselves. You sleep lightly

by maga 10y ago

>Loneliness - the emotion of being disconnected. You feel physical pain in your intestines and chest when you see others enjoying themselves. You sleep lightly and wake often. Your immune system starts to slow and you start to get sick. Your metabolism slows down, yet you eat more often than usual. Your circulation slows, and you feel cold. Is it some sort of a hyperbole or I really have to hate people and be physically sick to qualify as a lonely person according to psychiatrists?

sridca 10y ago
It is well known that stress (which doesn't necessitate hating people; in fact, merely feeling lonely will do) weakens immune system. http://www.apa.org/research/action/immune.aspx http://www.apa.org/research/action/immune.aspx
- maga 10y ago
  That's that, but I'd imagine that "feeling physical pain seeing others enjoying themselves" is something far more serious than just loneliness, maybe I misunderstand the term. You rise a valid point though, while often being objectively lonely and "disconnected" I seldom felt discomfort about it. That would explain good health marks.
  - sridca 10y ago
    I took his "feel physical pain in your intestines and chest" to mean, in part, that "sinking feeling in the gut" which is due mainly to the stimulation of the Vagus Nerve[1]. These physical sensations follow the emotion (of loneliness) itself--an affective experience preceding, and triggering, the physical after-effects--which PieterH did not speak much about. I wonder why. [1] See https://www.reddit.com/r/explainlikeimfive/comments/2bakbc/eli5_why_do_we_get_a_sinking_feeling_in_our/?st=isqofg18&sh=ab7034e7 https://www.reddit.com/r/explainlikeimfive/comments/2bakbc/e...
    - 888uuii 10y ago
      raises hand I don't feel loneliness in my gut; I feel it in my head.
PieterH 10y ago
That text does not mention hate, and the physical pain I'm referring to is mostly low level discomfort. It can still drive some people to extreme behaviour.
animal531 10y ago
Agreed, the secondary characteristics feel somewhat circumstantial to me. I'm lonely, but sleep a solid 8 hours (except if bothered by other factors such as mismanagement of heat etc which will wake me up). I don't get sick, eat a normal amount and don't feel colder than usual.
FrozenVoid 10y ago
It is hyperbole, average people can cope with being disconnected from society. Some people who are lonely and develop these symptoms are better explained as reaction from DPD https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dependent_personality_disorder https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dependent_personality_disorder In evolutionary terms, a lone hunter/traveler that becomes a shriveling ball of tears when completely alone doesn't pass the survival threshold: people are not evolved to die from being alone. Besides in the modern world, you're not "really alone" unless you live off-grid in some remote wilderness with no internet/phone/radio. Disconnecting from society is far harder than what people think of it(not using mobile devices 24/7 on your person is not "disconnection")

by maga 10y ago

sridca 10y ago

It is well known that stress (which doesn't necessitate hating people; in fact, merely feeling lonely will do) weakens immune system. http://www.apa.org/research/action/immune.aspx http://www.apa.org/research/action/immune.aspx

maga 10y ago
That's that, but I'd imagine that "feeling physical pain seeing others enjoying themselves" is something far more serious than just loneliness, maybe I misunderstand the term. You rise a valid point though, while often being objectively lonely and "disconnected" I seldom felt discomfort about it. That would explain good health marks.
- sridca 10y ago
  I took his "feel physical pain in your intestines and chest" to mean, in part, that "sinking feeling in the gut" which is due mainly to the stimulation of the Vagus Nerve[1]. These physical sensations follow the emotion (of loneliness) itself--an affective experience preceding, and triggering, the physical after-effects--which PieterH did not speak much about. I wonder why. [1] See https://www.reddit.com/r/explainlikeimfive/comments/2bakbc/eli5_why_do_we_get_a_sinking_feeling_in_our/?st=isqofg18&sh=ab7034e7 https://www.reddit.com/r/explainlikeimfive/comments/2bakbc/e...
  - 888uuii 10y ago
    raises hand I don't feel loneliness in my gut; I feel it in my head.

PieterH 10y ago

That text does not mention hate, and the physical pain I'm referring to is mostly low level discomfort. It can still drive some people to extreme behaviour.

animal531 10y ago

Agreed, the secondary characteristics feel somewhat circumstantial to me. I'm lonely, but sleep a solid 8 hours (except if bothered by other factors such as mismanagement of heat etc which will wake me up). I don't get sick, eat a normal amount and don't feel colder than usual.

FrozenVoid 10y ago

It is hyperbole, average people can cope with being disconnected from society. Some people who are lonely and develop these symptoms are better explained as reaction from DPD https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dependent_personality_disorder https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dependent_personality_disorder In evolutionary terms, a lone hunter/traveler that becomes a shriveling ball of tears when completely alone doesn't pass the survival threshold: people are not evolved to die from being alone. Besides in the modern world, you're not "really alone" unless you live off-grid in some remote wilderness with no internet/phone/radio. Disconnecting from society is far harder than what people think of it(not using mobile devices 24/7 on your person is not "disconnection")