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Being a speaker at the same event is hardly being forced to associate with someone, nor indeed a reason to attempt to publicly repudiate them. Additionally, in

Being a speaker at the same event is hardly being forced to associate with someone, nor indeed a reason to attempt to publicly repudiate them. Additionally, in my experience Linus Tovalds is not a jerk. Is this something you sense you get by reading email threads? Perhaps you associate a lack of politeness and deference with being a jerk, but it really isn't the same.

thomasfoster96 10y ago
> Perhaps you associate a lack of politeness and deference with being a jerk, but it really isn't the same. I would certainly associate those two attributes with being a jerk.
- angry_octet 10y ago
  It's hard without specific examples, but brusque or somewhat impolite generally seem common. For example, someone asserts something technical in a strong way, lacking technical insight, or re-animating a zombie topic. The response is often short and somewhat acerbic. To be honest, replying in a sensitive way, with references to past converations, takes a long time. I would contrast this with jerk as being someone who deliberately disregards the comfort and feelings of others to satisfy themselves: the queue jumper, Steve Jobs, someone who humiliates people on minimum wage, who doesn't re-rack the weights at the gym, who parks in the disabled car park.
- ori_b 10y ago
  I don't. In fact, the opposite: I find overly deferential people difficult to work with. I'd prefer to work with someone that is going to call me an idiot when I do something dumb than someone who will keep their mouth shut and work around me -- Letting me do stupid things without correction is unpleasant. And having people waste time trying to make me feel better or whatever just annoys me. Besides, reading a good insult is just plain fun. Especially if I know the person. (And no, Linus tends not to flame people he doesn't know.)
bryanrasmussen 10y ago
I'm pretty sure lack of politeness is one of the defining traits of a jerk, yes. Which I'm quite aware of because as a lot of programmers I am something of a jerk.

thomasfoster96 10y ago

> Perhaps you associate a lack of politeness and deference with being a jerk, but it really isn't the same. I would certainly associate those two attributes with being a jerk.

angry_octet 10y ago
It's hard without specific examples, but brusque or somewhat impolite generally seem common. For example, someone asserts something technical in a strong way, lacking technical insight, or re-animating a zombie topic. The response is often short and somewhat acerbic. To be honest, replying in a sensitive way, with references to past converations, takes a long time. I would contrast this with jerk as being someone who deliberately disregards the comfort and feelings of others to satisfy themselves: the queue jumper, Steve Jobs, someone who humiliates people on minimum wage, who doesn't re-rack the weights at the gym, who parks in the disabled car park.
ori_b 10y ago
I don't. In fact, the opposite: I find overly deferential people difficult to work with. I'd prefer to work with someone that is going to call me an idiot when I do something dumb than someone who will keep their mouth shut and work around me -- Letting me do stupid things without correction is unpleasant. And having people waste time trying to make me feel better or whatever just annoys me. Besides, reading a good insult is just plain fun. Especially if I know the person. (And no, Linus tends not to flame people he doesn't know.)

bryanrasmussen 10y ago

I'm pretty sure lack of politeness is one of the defining traits of a jerk, yes. Which I'm quite aware of because as a lot of programmers I am something of a jerk.