Congrats on making it through. I was extremely ill @ 29 years old and came to terms with my seemingly imminent mortality. It changed me completely from an Alpha

Congrats on making it through. I was extremely ill @ 29 years old and came to terms with my seemingly imminent mortality. It changed me completely from an Alpha anal-retentive to 'just another guy' enjoying the moment... more or less, there is no Utopia I have found. No one who hasn't been on their deathbed for an extended period could understand the experience, the slowness of time under the influence of ever-present discomfort and the desperation of impending finality. It is indeed maddening, then you get past it. If you're lucky enough to get a 2nd chance, your values can not not change. I've shared a campfire or two at the lake with fellow "happy people". I don't know if we're enlightened, calloussed or brain damaged, but I am much more contented in life without the high "highs" and low 'lows" of the 110% lifestyle. To each their own.