Commas can be used to indicate a pause in speech. Read it that way and the sentence doesn't necessarily sound incorrect (the obvious purpose being to put empha

Commas can be used to indicate a pause in speech. Read it that way and the sentence doesn't necessarily sound incorrect (the obvious purpose being to put emphasis on the word "Now") I don't see anything wrong with the so-called "12-year-old" line. The arc doesn't look particularly unsightly to me. It's clearly a personal preference and I can see why you wouldn't like it but your mistake is in assuming everything you dislike is automatically in poor taste.