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You have classic signs of depression. Perhaps major depression. The worst part of depression is that it clouds normal thought processes. That's probably why

You have classic signs of depression. Perhaps major depression. The worst part of depression is that it clouds normal thought processes. That's probably why you can't perform as you once did. Find a way to see a psychiatrist you feel comfortable around. Go with a family or friend if that helps get you over the hump. So many high achievers I know go through this. You're not alone, and with proper help you'll get through it, and be stronger too.

hkmurakami 10y ago
> The worst part of depression is that it clouds normal thought processes. That's probably why you can't perform as you once did. Can attest. Can absolutely attest to this.
athenot 10y ago
> Find a way to see a psychiatrist you feel comfortable around. For some reason there can be a stigma around that profession but PLEASE don't let that deter you, as it will be tremendously helpful. They can help you see your true self when things seem cloudy.
- acjohnson55 10y ago
  On top of that, I'd keep trying until you find someone you click with. A lot of people get discouraged when the first doctor or counselor they speak with isn't a good fit.
  - wpietri 10y ago
    Definitely. It took me a few. In particular, I needed to find somebody with a good personality match who was also smart enough to keep up with me and experienced enough to spot my bullshit and call me on it in a productive way. And a note to deathbysw123: I too really recommend finding a therapist. I used to think that if I was smart enough I could figure this stuff out on my own, and that pride kept me from getting help. But a therapist has two advantages: they have seen a zillion people, and so have raw data for pattern-finding that you don't, and they are outside your skull, giving them a perspective you can't have.
  - triplesec 10y ago
    This is true. There are a lot of terrible therapists and psychiatrists around, and it's hard to know how to choose. Also they are different. Therapists talk, psychiatrists give pills, and they should both rather have both tools for using either or or both as necessary. And Therapists have lots of different wys of operating too. Ask around of recommendations, and don't give up. Get a best friend to help you ehre, in case you feel it's too much. Good luck, there's loads of great advice here.
- eyelidlessness 10y ago
  There can also be a discomfort around psychiatrists and prescriptions. It's also worth mentioning that there are many other mental health professionals and services which do not prescribe pharmaceuticals and provide many other mental health services.
drivingmenuts 10y ago
Go see your doctor. If you have to, have a friend take you. Personally, I called my pastor and he threatened to come pick me up and drive me down there personally (he meant it in a good way). Do whatever it takes to get in there. Get the meds. Take them, if prescribed. They won't fix the problem, but they can help you thru the worst of it until things become a bit easier to deal with. I wound up weaning myself off of them (I don't recommend that, btw). For some people, they are long-term, but personally, I found it to be a bit too long-term. The biggest thing, and the hardest, is to be honest with your friends about it. I've told friends I have problems with depression. Turns out, another friend of mine does, too, and we try to help keep the other on an even-er keel. I told my boss and my relatives. They know that if they don't hear from me in a while, to come over and kick in the door or do what's necessary to drag me out into the light. Know this: you're going to have bad days and worse days and some good days. Pay attention and you'll be able to recognize them for what they are and when you need help. But get help. I've had to deal with everything from being unable to leave the house or turn on a light to irrational exuberance, on top of a couple of other medical issues. I'm nowhere near cured, but I'm not down in a hole anymore. It's survivable and your life doesn't have to suck.
- WhitneyLand 10y ago
  All great advice. I'm guessing that was some damn hard won wisdom that took years to acquire. Hopefully it will be easier for the OP.
  - drivingmenuts 10y ago
    That was three years ago. It ain't over yet. It's better - I'm making some changes to my life that will go a ways toward fixing some of the enabling issues. But it's still a long haul to being free of depression, and I suspect I may never be totally free, just better able to deal with it.
aianus 10y ago
People always say to get help but how specifically do you find a psychiatrist/therapist? Try them at random from yelp/yellow pages?
- spb 10y ago
  I found mine from a referral through an email to the author of an article on Psychology Today about issues similar to what I was going through, describing the kind of qualities I was looking for (specifically, I asked if they knew someone who'd be able to understand when I use movie and TV analogies to describe how I'm feeling). The author must have forwarded my email to a colleague (who may have, in turn, forwarded it to further links in a chain - all the intermediary addresses were duly absent from the final referral I got, as should be expected from professionals), because soon after, I got a response from a new contact, referring me to a therapist who turned out to be a good fit. Looking for a therapist can really suck (I'd had somewhere around eight months of trying at least five different bad-fit therapists before I tried the random-midnight-email approach above), so I figured I'd mention the approach that actually ended up working for me.
- gummysmrind 10y ago
  My health insurance had a list of people in the network but yeah. For a therapist you both need to be on the same page so you need to see who you click with. i saw one that just made me feel worst about my self. I just stopped going and tried someone different,eventually gave up on therapists... Psychiatrist is a little easier since they're all legit doctors, mds,or I got lucky. Although people like to talk about how mental health related drugs are over prescribed so i guess there's enough crappy ones. they're their to prescribe and make sure you don't get worse. its a simpler relationship, like the doctor you see when your leg breaks or a dentist.
- Flemlord 10y ago
  Go to Castle Connolly and search on Psychiatry in your area. This is a curated service that identifies the best doctors in any specialty; I've used it many times for myself and family members and always been happy with their recommendations. https://www.castleconnolly.com/ https://www.castleconnolly.com/ There is a small fee, although you can still see the doctor's name and location without joining.
Sacho 10y ago
Ken White is an (arguably) highly successful lawyer(partner in his own firm, happily married with two children, etc), who runs the law blog popehat.com. He has been diagnosed with major depression, and a lot of people have said his posts on it have really helped them re-evaluate their position: https://popehat.com/tag/depression/ https://popehat.com/tag/depression/

hkmurakami 10y ago

> The worst part of depression is that it clouds normal thought processes. That's probably why you can't perform as you once did. Can attest. Can absolutely attest to this.

athenot 10y ago

> Find a way to see a psychiatrist you feel comfortable around. For some reason there can be a stigma around that profession but PLEASE don't let that deter you, as it will be tremendously helpful. They can help you see your true self when things seem cloudy.

acjohnson55 10y ago
On top of that, I'd keep trying until you find someone you click with. A lot of people get discouraged when the first doctor or counselor they speak with isn't a good fit.
- wpietri 10y ago
  Definitely. It took me a few. In particular, I needed to find somebody with a good personality match who was also smart enough to keep up with me and experienced enough to spot my bullshit and call me on it in a productive way. And a note to deathbysw123: I too really recommend finding a therapist. I used to think that if I was smart enough I could figure this stuff out on my own, and that pride kept me from getting help. But a therapist has two advantages: they have seen a zillion people, and so have raw data for pattern-finding that you don't, and they are outside your skull, giving them a perspective you can't have.
- triplesec 10y ago
  This is true. There are a lot of terrible therapists and psychiatrists around, and it's hard to know how to choose. Also they are different. Therapists talk, psychiatrists give pills, and they should both rather have both tools for using either or or both as necessary. And Therapists have lots of different wys of operating too. Ask around of recommendations, and don't give up. Get a best friend to help you ehre, in case you feel it's too much. Good luck, there's loads of great advice here.
eyelidlessness 10y ago
There can also be a discomfort around psychiatrists and prescriptions. It's also worth mentioning that there are many other mental health professionals and services which do not prescribe pharmaceuticals and provide many other mental health services.

drivingmenuts 10y ago

Go see your doctor. If you have to, have a friend take you. Personally, I called my pastor and he threatened to come pick me up and drive me down there personally (he meant it in a good way). Do whatever it takes to get in there. Get the meds. Take them, if prescribed. They won't fix the problem, but they can help you thru the worst of it until things become a bit easier to deal with. I wound up weaning myself off of them (I don't recommend that, btw). For some people, they are long-term, but personally, I found it to be a bit too long-term. The biggest thing, and the hardest, is to be honest with your friends about it. I've told friends I have problems with depression. Turns out, another friend of mine does, too, and we try to help keep the other on an even-er keel. I told my boss and my relatives. They know that if they don't hear from me in a while, to come over and kick in the door or do what's necessary to drag me out into the light. Know this: you're going to have bad days and worse days and some good days. Pay attention and you'll be able to recognize them for what they are and when you need help. But get help. I've had to deal with everything from being unable to leave the house or turn on a light to irrational exuberance, on top of a couple of other medical issues. I'm nowhere near cured, but I'm not down in a hole anymore. It's survivable and your life doesn't have to suck.

WhitneyLand 10y ago
All great advice. I'm guessing that was some damn hard won wisdom that took years to acquire. Hopefully it will be easier for the OP.
- drivingmenuts 10y ago
  That was three years ago. It ain't over yet. It's better - I'm making some changes to my life that will go a ways toward fixing some of the enabling issues. But it's still a long haul to being free of depression, and I suspect I may never be totally free, just better able to deal with it.

aianus 10y ago

People always say to get help but how specifically do you find a psychiatrist/therapist? Try them at random from yelp/yellow pages?

spb 10y ago
I found mine from a referral through an email to the author of an article on Psychology Today about issues similar to what I was going through, describing the kind of qualities I was looking for (specifically, I asked if they knew someone who'd be able to understand when I use movie and TV analogies to describe how I'm feeling). The author must have forwarded my email to a colleague (who may have, in turn, forwarded it to further links in a chain - all the intermediary addresses were duly absent from the final referral I got, as should be expected from professionals), because soon after, I got a response from a new contact, referring me to a therapist who turned out to be a good fit. Looking for a therapist can really suck (I'd had somewhere around eight months of trying at least five different bad-fit therapists before I tried the random-midnight-email approach above), so I figured I'd mention the approach that actually ended up working for me.
gummysmrind 10y ago
My health insurance had a list of people in the network but yeah. For a therapist you both need to be on the same page so you need to see who you click with. i saw one that just made me feel worst about my self. I just stopped going and tried someone different,eventually gave up on therapists... Psychiatrist is a little easier since they're all legit doctors, mds,or I got lucky. Although people like to talk about how mental health related drugs are over prescribed so i guess there's enough crappy ones. they're their to prescribe and make sure you don't get worse. its a simpler relationship, like the doctor you see when your leg breaks or a dentist.
Flemlord 10y ago
Go to Castle Connolly and search on Psychiatry in your area. This is a curated service that identifies the best doctors in any specialty; I've used it many times for myself and family members and always been happy with their recommendations. https://www.castleconnolly.com/ https://www.castleconnolly.com/ There is a small fee, although you can still see the doctor's name and location without joining.

Sacho 10y ago

Ken White is an (arguably) highly successful lawyer(partner in his own firm, happily married with two children, etc), who runs the law blog popehat.com. He has been diagnosed with major depression, and a lot of people have said his posts on it have really helped them re-evaluate their position: https://popehat.com/tag/depression/ https://popehat.com/tag/depression/