> They’ll think I invited them to coffee because I have a crush on them. This is so true. I'm an aromantic lesbian, so even though I'm attracted to women, I ha

> They’ll think I invited them to coffee because I have a crush on them. This is so true. I'm an aromantic lesbian, so even though I'm attracted to women, I have no desire to date anyone. But I'm worried people won't know that I'm aromantic and will think I'm hitting on them when I just want to hang out and maybe become friends. A few years ago, I pretty much botched any chance I had to be friends with one of my female coworkers, who was a really cool person I'd have liked to hang out with more. Unfortunately, I was afraid to talk to her, ask her to hang out after work, etc., because I was terrified she'd think I have a crush on her and was hitting on her. It doesn't help that I'm transgender and I knew her before my transition, so I was always afraid she'd think of me as just being another guy trying to get into her pants. Oh, and it didn't help that I was jealous of her, because she looks pretty much exactly how I want to look but will never be able to (dysphoria is a powerful thing). As such, I was terribly awkward around her, and every time I wanted to hang out with her or anything, I either decided against it or was so nervous and awkward that anyone around me could tell. I'm a little better at it now, thankfully. And, yes, I'm the kind of awkward person who over-analyzes every conversation I've ever had with anyone.