4 ms·

My "American Dream" is to be free to do the following things as often, and in whatever proportions, that I please: * Learn and improve myself * Contribute to

by mcantor 17y ago

My "American Dream" is to be free to do the following things as often, and in whatever proportions, that I please: * Learn and improve myself * Contribute to and improve the world around me * Spend time with friends, loved ones, and interesting people * Travel the world, because the three prior goals: self-improvement, world-improvement and socializing; seem to be different everywhere we go, and I think the variety would be enlightening in many ways. I view this as a goal that will be achieved gradually, rather than in one fell swoop. While I still have a 9-to-5 job, I make time to improve myself--physically and mentally--by reading, drawing, fencing, and lifting weights. I endeavor to contribute to my surroundings by volunteering when I can, and always lending an ear to someone who needs to be listened to. I use the money from my 9-to-5 to pay for gas and plane tickets so I may visit friends and they may visit me. My financial goals are mostly to get out of debt (I have $30k in student loans; I never carry a credit card balance). I make less than $60k/year and live quite comfortably on it, even paying $600-$1,000/mo. in student loans. In the 2 - 8 year term, I plan to save up a buffer of 1 year's living expenses so I don't need to worry about unemployment. In the longer term, I plan to start some form of business that will generate "passive income" (ugh, I hate that term) to the extent that my living expenses will be taken care of, and I no longer need to concern myself with employment to stay afloat. That will free up massive chunks of my most important asset: time. In terms of "stuff"... I would eventually like a place where I can have a studio and fitness room, but I endeavor to have as small an amount of "stuff" as possible, as I find clutter exhausting.

kirstendirksen 17y ago
I wonder how many of us find clutter exhausting. My husband can't even start his day with too much stuff around the house (on the floor, hanging off chairs... that would be my contribution), but I am able to overlook it a bit more. Though since living with him, I have realized that even I would prefer to live without clutter. Though somehow so many people can't seem to be able to hop off the stuff treadmill: buying, collecting, storing (I'm amazed at the self storage business in the U.S.) and trashing. I am not saying I'm always immune either. I think partly it's being aware of stuff collection as a problem (even just for your own sanity).
- mcantor 17y ago
  I have been pleased to note that, after moving in with my girlfriend, I have "infected" her with my anti-clutter mindset. I try to live by the general rule of, "If I haven't thought about it in 6 months, it shouldn't be here," and it delighted me the first time I saw her with a box full of old odds-and-ends and explained on her way outside, "I haven't thought about or used any of this in years." Your note about not being immune to the "stuff treadmill" (great term, btw) rings true to me, too, though. Because of our cultural upbringing, it's incredibly easy to get caught up by the consumerist undertow. I was inspired by George Carlin's rant on "stuff," which someone transcribed here: http://www.writers-free-reference.com/funny/story085.htm http://www.writers-free-reference.com/funny/story085.htm It's less endearing without his delivery, but the idea is the same: we get emotionally connected to our stuff, and in many cases, that isn't conducive to removing stress from our lives. I think he also touches on the (somewhat pernicious) assumption that Americans grow up believing, which is the assumption that everyone is "supposed" to want and have a big giant house filled with all kinds of tchotchkes. I may some day own a house, like I said in my OP, but I never want to have so much stuff that I couldn't fit as much at least half of everything that isn't furniture into the back of my station wagon. No specific reason for that particular measure of proportion... it just feels right. Other than the "6-month rule," I just try to be brutal about every individual object I come in contact with. I try to occasionally remind myself to ask, "How does this thing improve my life and make me happier?" The answer could be as simple as, "Looking at it makes me smile," but if it really doesn't do anything for me, I put it in a box, and--as with before--if I don't think about it for 6 months, it fails the test and I get rid of it.
  - kirstendirksen 17y ago
    I would make a similar comment to you as I made above to MrFoof. Maybe because it fits with what feels right for me, but I like your 6-month-rule and your question for every object. In many ways I think when we get too much stuff the same thing happens that happens to kids when they have too many toys. They seem to lose interest in all of them. So we put most of them away in drawers and pull them out a few at a time. It's as if without all the clutter of lots of toys around our daughter enjoys herself, and the few toys, much more. I would also repeat my comment to MrFoof that if you're interested in contributing to my documentary, I'd love to see some visuals of your de-cluttered lifestyle.
kirstendirksen 17y ago
Travel is another point I've pondered a lot since I started our website. I used to fly a lot. In most aspects of my life, I can be a pennypincher, but it was the one area that I felt like the experience was worth whatever pricetag. Then I started reading about the carbon emissions of flying (and the emissions of kerosene jet fuel) and I started re-evaluating. So I started to pick my trips more carefully and to try to fly less and stay longer if I could. While at first it was an environmental consideration, now I'm realizing I'm actually happier without all the moving around. My husband calls it my family's "pack-and-go" mentality. I'm not saying everyone would be happier this way- as I definitely had my share of years exploring the world/my country a bit-, but for now, I like staying in one place a bit more. And the curious thing is, I doubt I would have discovered that if I hadn't thought about carbon footprint stuff. I mean, the "pack-and-go" mentality is a part of my family culture: I live in Spain, my sister lives in Sydney, another sibling lives in the South, another in Seattle, my parents in San Francisco, another is married to a Canadian... it's tough to avoid, but possible to cut down a bit I suppose. And now that my income is drastically reduced from what it used to be, flying really isn't an option like it used to be either. So I am grateful that I don't feel the need to move about like I used to. Though, that's not to say, I don't fly. I live abroad so every year we take one trip home. And that in itself is more than the majority of people. So all I can say is I've reduced my moving about, just a bit, and am happier for it. For now.
- mcantor 17y ago
  I think that our needs naturally change and shift over time. When you did your travelling, you probably found it quite fulfilling (I could be wrong). Maybe you would never have gotten to this point, which you find even more fulfilling, without doing the travelling first! Also, for what it's worth, when I referred to travelling, I had more short vacation-like trips in mind, as opposed to extended relocations or migrations for years at a time. I would never argue that such bite-sized travels could let someone sample variety in the way that a long-term immersion would, but it would still be a real learning experience. Interesting point about the carbon emissions... I never really thought about what a technological indulgence air travel is. I suppose that when my social circle splintered and moved all over the place, I felt entitled to see everyone as often as possible, but maybe conquering the distance costs more than just the price of a few plane tickets.

by mcantor 17y ago

kirstendirksen 17y ago

I wonder how many of us find clutter exhausting. My husband can't even start his day with too much stuff around the house (on the floor, hanging off chairs... that would be my contribution), but I am able to overlook it a bit more. Though since living with him, I have realized that even I would prefer to live without clutter. Though somehow so many people can't seem to be able to hop off the stuff treadmill: buying, collecting, storing (I'm amazed at the self storage business in the U.S.) and trashing. I am not saying I'm always immune either. I think partly it's being aware of stuff collection as a problem (even just for your own sanity).

mcantor 17y ago
I have been pleased to note that, after moving in with my girlfriend, I have "infected" her with my anti-clutter mindset. I try to live by the general rule of, "If I haven't thought about it in 6 months, it shouldn't be here," and it delighted me the first time I saw her with a box full of old odds-and-ends and explained on her way outside, "I haven't thought about or used any of this in years." Your note about not being immune to the "stuff treadmill" (great term, btw) rings true to me, too, though. Because of our cultural upbringing, it's incredibly easy to get caught up by the consumerist undertow. I was inspired by George Carlin's rant on "stuff," which someone transcribed here: http://www.writers-free-reference.com/funny/story085.htm http://www.writers-free-reference.com/funny/story085.htm It's less endearing without his delivery, but the idea is the same: we get emotionally connected to our stuff, and in many cases, that isn't conducive to removing stress from our lives. I think he also touches on the (somewhat pernicious) assumption that Americans grow up believing, which is the assumption that everyone is "supposed" to want and have a big giant house filled with all kinds of tchotchkes. I may some day own a house, like I said in my OP, but I never want to have so much stuff that I couldn't fit as much at least half of everything that isn't furniture into the back of my station wagon. No specific reason for that particular measure of proportion... it just feels right. Other than the "6-month rule," I just try to be brutal about every individual object I come in contact with. I try to occasionally remind myself to ask, "How does this thing improve my life and make me happier?" The answer could be as simple as, "Looking at it makes me smile," but if it really doesn't do anything for me, I put it in a box, and--as with before--if I don't think about it for 6 months, it fails the test and I get rid of it.
- kirstendirksen 17y ago
  I would make a similar comment to you as I made above to MrFoof. Maybe because it fits with what feels right for me, but I like your 6-month-rule and your question for every object. In many ways I think when we get too much stuff the same thing happens that happens to kids when they have too many toys. They seem to lose interest in all of them. So we put most of them away in drawers and pull them out a few at a time. It's as if without all the clutter of lots of toys around our daughter enjoys herself, and the few toys, much more. I would also repeat my comment to MrFoof that if you're interested in contributing to my documentary, I'd love to see some visuals of your de-cluttered lifestyle.

kirstendirksen 17y ago

Travel is another point I've pondered a lot since I started our website. I used to fly a lot. In most aspects of my life, I can be a pennypincher, but it was the one area that I felt like the experience was worth whatever pricetag. Then I started reading about the carbon emissions of flying (and the emissions of kerosene jet fuel) and I started re-evaluating. So I started to pick my trips more carefully and to try to fly less and stay longer if I could. While at first it was an environmental consideration, now I'm realizing I'm actually happier without all the moving around. My husband calls it my family's "pack-and-go" mentality. I'm not saying everyone would be happier this way- as I definitely had my share of years exploring the world/my country a bit-, but for now, I like staying in one place a bit more. And the curious thing is, I doubt I would have discovered that if I hadn't thought about carbon footprint stuff. I mean, the "pack-and-go" mentality is a part of my family culture: I live in Spain, my sister lives in Sydney, another sibling lives in the South, another in Seattle, my parents in San Francisco, another is married to a Canadian... it's tough to avoid, but possible to cut down a bit I suppose. And now that my income is drastically reduced from what it used to be, flying really isn't an option like it used to be either. So I am grateful that I don't feel the need to move about like I used to. Though, that's not to say, I don't fly. I live abroad so every year we take one trip home. And that in itself is more than the majority of people. So all I can say is I've reduced my moving about, just a bit, and am happier for it. For now.

mcantor 17y ago
I think that our needs naturally change and shift over time. When you did your travelling, you probably found it quite fulfilling (I could be wrong). Maybe you would never have gotten to this point, which you find even more fulfilling, without doing the travelling first! Also, for what it's worth, when I referred to travelling, I had more short vacation-like trips in mind, as opposed to extended relocations or migrations for years at a time. I would never argue that such bite-sized travels could let someone sample variety in the way that a long-term immersion would, but it would still be a real learning experience. Interesting point about the carbon emissions... I never really thought about what a technological indulgence air travel is. I suppose that when my social circle splintered and moved all over the place, I felt entitled to see everyone as often as possible, but maybe conquering the distance costs more than just the price of a few plane tickets.