5 ms·

Hmm well I don't want to hear what a nightmare my colleagues lives are. I ask "How was the weekend" you say "Fine". I don't care that your house burned down.

Hmm well I don't want to hear what a nightmare my colleagues lives are. I ask "How was the weekend" you say "Fine". I don't care that your house burned down. Yep I am a brit!

solipsism 10y ago
Why ask then. Are there literally no other things you can think of saying that would satisfy the social norms? How about "Hope you had a good weekend."
- sillypog 10y ago
  Or "Did you see that ludicrous display last night?"
  - deleted 10y ago
    [deleted]
vertex-four 10y ago
I'm a Brit, and I fully expect to hear how people are doing when I ask them that question directly. If I didn't want to know, I'd not ask. If the question is always to be answered with "fine", then is the person you ask ever going to notice if you don't ask it? You don't care about what they feel either way and they know it.
wbl 10y ago
Why would you ask if you don't want to hear the answer?
- dragonwriter 10y ago
  > Why would you ask if you don't want to hear the answer? For lots of people the "How are you?" "Fine." exchange is a ritualized interaction which has become detached from the literal meanings of the words. Like the fact that even non-religious people use a contraction of "God Be With Ye" when parting.
jonknee 10y ago
In the context of this article I believe the author would say you shouldn't ask because if you don't want to hear the answer you are not being honest/authentic. On the flip side being honest doesn't mean having to detail everything good or bad in ones life, but if things really are not fine it means saying so. "I have been better actually, but it's a new week and I'm ready to turn the page." You might actually learn a thing or two about someone that way!
aklemm 10y ago
Hate to pile on, but you might be the insufferable one.
- HerpDerpLerp 10y ago
  I don't doubt it :)
logfromblammo 10y ago
I like it better like this: Mr. A: How was your weekend? Mr. B: Fine. Bit of trouble with the house, though. Mr. A: Nothing serious, I hope? Mr. B: No, not at all. A little fire got out of control for a bit. Mr. A: Was there much damage? Mr. B: No, once it got down to the foundations it went right out. Mr. A: Was anybody hurt? Mr. B: Not much. Grandma died very gently from the smoke inhalation. And I lost barely more than my eyebrows and 15% of my skin. Mr. A: That's lucky. Mr. B: Quite right. How was yours? Mr. A: Fine. Bit of trouble with the car....

Hmm well I don't want to hear what a nightmare my colleagues lives are. I ask "How was the weekend" you say "Fine". I don't care that your house burned down. Yep I am a brit!

solipsism 10y ago

Why ask then. Are there literally no other things you can think of saying that would satisfy the social norms? How about "Hope you had a good weekend."

sillypog 10y ago
Or "Did you see that ludicrous display last night?"
- deleted 10y ago
  [deleted]

vertex-four 10y ago

I'm a Brit, and I fully expect to hear how people are doing when I ask them that question directly. If I didn't want to know, I'd not ask. If the question is always to be answered with "fine", then is the person you ask ever going to notice if you don't ask it? You don't care about what they feel either way and they know it.

wbl 10y ago

Why would you ask if you don't want to hear the answer?

dragonwriter 10y ago
> Why would you ask if you don't want to hear the answer? For lots of people the "How are you?" "Fine." exchange is a ritualized interaction which has become detached from the literal meanings of the words. Like the fact that even non-religious people use a contraction of "God Be With Ye" when parting.

jonknee 10y ago

In the context of this article I believe the author would say you shouldn't ask because if you don't want to hear the answer you are not being honest/authentic. On the flip side being honest doesn't mean having to detail everything good or bad in ones life, but if things really are not fine it means saying so. "I have been better actually, but it's a new week and I'm ready to turn the page." You might actually learn a thing or two about someone that way!

aklemm 10y ago

Hate to pile on, but you might be the insufferable one.

HerpDerpLerp 10y ago
I don't doubt it :)

logfromblammo 10y ago

I like it better like this: Mr. A: How was your weekend? Mr. B: Fine. Bit of trouble with the house, though. Mr. A: Nothing serious, I hope? Mr. B: No, not at all. A little fire got out of control for a bit. Mr. A: Was there much damage? Mr. B: No, once it got down to the foundations it went right out. Mr. A: Was anybody hurt? Mr. B: Not much. Grandma died very gently from the smoke inhalation. And I lost barely more than my eyebrows and 15% of my skin. Mr. A: That's lucky. Mr. B: Quite right. How was yours? Mr. A: Fine. Bit of trouble with the car....