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Having read through all the comments and your responses it appears your son is capable of controlling himself, but knows he can get away with his behaviour in p
by danieltillett 10y ago
Having read through all the comments and your responses it appears your son is capable of controlling himself, but knows he can get away with his behaviour in private. There is only one solution which is for him to learn that his private behaviour is not going to be tolerated any more. How you do this is up to you and your wife, but once you go down this path do not turn back.
- rymohr 10y agoHe can to a point, but once he gets tired / bored the behavior comes out even in public. Yesterday my wife took the kids to the beach and tried to get a photo of the three of them together. In the sequence you see him pull our 3-year old down and then start chewing on his fingers while he's smacking our 1-year old in the back (not hard but quick repeated pats). The last shot is him staring at the camera with his fingers in his mouth and his other hand hitting the side of his head. It's an incredibly sad photo for my wife and I to look at. He's obviously tormented by something internally but nobody we've worked with has a clue what it is or how to help him cope with it.
- danieltillett 10y agoIn this case this might be a situation that you just need to endure since if he can’t control himself then nothing you can do can really help. Do you have a relative that it he could go and stay with for a time? Moving to a new location can break people out of the behavioural mould that have got stuck in and having him spend some time in a new location with new people might allow him stop his self-distructive behaviour.