4 ms·
This sentence jumped out at me: >You also have those individuals who are “not rude” but keep telling people to “suck it up”, to get “their act together” or to
by crucini 10y ago
This sentence jumped out at me:
>You also have those individuals who are “not rude” but keep telling people to “suck it up”, to get “their act together” or to believe that disrespect is just a question of interpretation.
Sounds like the author has a lot of conflicts. Sounds like he often receives unwanted advice to cool his jets. Talking about "assholes" is somewhat pointless because conflict is a fact of life, and in most conflicts both parties consider the counterparty an asshole.
This author doesn't show any philosophy, self-insight or humility; rather he is surrounded by "assholes" with "inappropriate" behavior. (He keeps using that word "inappropriate" - but if people agreed on what was appropriate, would we still have conflict?)
Here's something I've learned over decades of working with other people: fix yourself first. Become tactful, adroit and thick-skinned. Recognize that absorbing the bumps and jolts of social interaction is part of the job, whether your are a salesman or an engineer. Recognize that the "asshole" is right in his own mind and may in fact be be right, period.
- solipsism 10y agoif people agreed on what was appropriate, would we still have conflict? Yes. It strikes me as a strange question. People act in ways they themselves would consider inappropriate all the time. We're emotional creatures.
- losteric 10y agoI've heard this quote a couple times, it seems appropriate: > If you run into an asshole in the morning, you ran into an asshole. If you run into assholes all day, you're the asshole.
- mintplant 10y ago> >You also have those individuals who are “not rude” but keep telling people to “suck it up”, to get “their act together” > fix yourself first. Become tactful, adroit and thick-skinned Aren't you just demonstrating exactly what the author was complaining about?
- CamperBob2 10y agoThis is just a rephrasing of Postel's dictum. Be liberal in what you accept from others, but conservative in what you dish out.
- crucini 10y agoTwo answers: 1. Yes. It is not easy to take the advice of "suck it up." But if you are getting that advice regularly, there's a reason. 2. Paradoxically, telling people on the internet to fix themselves is the opposite of fixing myself. Advising tact is not tactful. If I knew this author in real life, I would probably commiserate with him, give him sympathy and understanding. Only if he's a close friend or shows signs of receptiveness would I offer the advice he really needs.