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It is said that pain is a fact, a by-product of life and the human condition. But suffering is a choice. Many simply choose not to suffer with their pain.
by spdustin 10y ago
It is said that pain is a fact, a by-product of life and the human condition. But suffering is a choice. Many simply choose not to suffer with their pain.
- antris 10y agoA depressed mind doesn't work like that. For a depressed person, their brain is constantly torturing them, and the depressed point of view seems much more real. "You can choose to pretend you're happy like the rest, but you know how life really goes."
- Ntrails 10y agoI think you missed the point, the way to "not suffer" is death. In general every morning we make a decision on whether the expected future happiness is going to outweigh the expected future suffering. When that fails (and it does) we find reasons of duty to keep going, for the people we love etc. You're right, depressed people have a skewed vision of the future and it destroys their expectations of happiness.
- idanoeman 10y agoI don't think that's obvious - spdustin could be speaking from a buddhist point of view: suffering is caused by desire, not pain. You can choose to remove desire and suffering from the mind through meditation.
- mikeash 10y agoWhat a terrifying sentiment. I'm astonished at how attracted people are to theories where problems are necessarily the fault of the person experiencing them. Hey, if you're suffering, there's an easy solution: just choose not to! Gee, why didn't I ever think of that.
- spdustin 10y agoI think I took something different from it than others are. Many people choose not to suffer, because "suicide is an option". Or pills. Or therapy. Or, the lucky ones, they can switch it off. Depression (noted in another comment) further limits the ways by which one can control the suffering brought on by pain. I know this well. Many of us do.
- mikeash 10y agoThe strong will to live inherent in most humans means that suicide is typically not a choice people can make. That's kind of my whole point: the fact that anybody can ever make this choice is remarkable. But to take the possibility of suicide and thereby declare that suffering is a choice makes no sense to me. It may be for some, but not for most.
- spdustin 10y agoYou did see that I listed other options, right?
- mikeash 10y agoDoes it matter? There are plenty of people suffering from problems that can't be fixed by pills or therapy and who are not mentally capable of suicide. Suffering may be a choice for some, but it is not a choice for many.
- spdustin 10y agoI give up; you've checked out of the conversation and I don't believe I'm effectively choosing the words to match my feelings. Sorry if I caused any angst.
- saiko-chriskun 10y agois it really that astonishing? it means that you're in complete control of your experience. quite a powerful statement. this isn't a blame game, no one's pointing fingers at anyone and saying, 'gee just think more positively man" or whatever. it's a personal strategy for managing one's own suffering, and a quite powerful one at that.