How to Not Get Investment for Your Startup

It’s a stunningly humid evening in Soho, Hong Kong, two days after our startups MVP launch. Our Product Hunt listing reached a meagre 68 up-votes, though around 20 clients have integrated our product and two of these have upgraded to the $197 monthly subscription. Only a third of the way through my first strawberry daiquiri, I antisocially connect to WIFI and begin the habitual, smart phone facilitated dopamine hunt through: - Slack - Email - Skype An email notifying me of the Linkedin message shown above attracts my attention: "Hey Tom, I came across AskTina on Product Hunt and love the idea. I'm an investor at X, an NYC-based fund spun out of X- would love to set a time to chat and learn more about what you're building. Shoot me a note if you're free to discuss. Thanks X" To put this message in perspective… Over 4 years of starting startups/online businesses I have never been approached by or considered approaching an investor. A mixture of fear and $ signs scroll into my subconscious as I continue socialising. 2 hours (and numerous margarita’s later), it seems like a fantastic idea to respond. Fortunately enough, as I checked in the morning, we had managed to schedule a call for later that week. Though unfortunately like most of the investors we have spoken to over the past 3 months since that fateful response… “More traction please” Translated: you’re not good enough. The Medium post here: http://bit.ly/2a3sO9B Follows the rest of the journey of rejection and heartache that I believe accurately depicts the fundraising process for all early stage startups. I welcome all comments/questions below :)