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The first sentence should always be the ask. Give the recipient enough information in their [iOS alert | Gmail excerpt] to read it when they're in the right fr
by DelaneyM 10y ago
The first sentence should always be the ask.
Give the recipient enough information in their [iOS alert | Gmail excerpt] to read it when they're in the right frame of mind to think it over.
Professional email is not flirting. Guys flirt by first trying to get your attention and interest, then follow up with an invitation. I assume this gives him an opportunity to bail if he's not getting a welcome vibe, but that doesn't apply here.
See how much information you can pack into the first few words, so they can open it when they're ready. Follow that with the context and data they need to keep reading when they're ready to consider it. End with your own introduction, because you're the least interesting part of your letter (except insofar as you're a part of the venture).
- HappyTypist 10y agoApplies equally to all forms of communication. I pay a conscious effort to put the most important point in the excerpt. "Hi $name, interested in grabbing coffee? Bla bla bla I met you bla bla, bla bla talk about bla bla."
- philsnow 10y agoExcept in some very particular situations (maybe you're looking for investors in your coffee roastery tech startup), getting coffee is a means to an end, the "end" being the same thing as the "ask" that DelaneyM is referring to. "Hi $name, interested in grabbing coffee?" buries the "ask" until during the coffee chat. It can be tough to do, but I think a lot of very busy people would actually appreciate you just coming out and asking for what you want, even in the first sentence.
- Mz 10y agoI think he meant: Even if you are flirting, tell her what you want in the first few words. Makes sense to me.
- deleted 10y ago[deleted]