5 ms·

Initially I wanted to post a silly comment to the original question, but after I read your answer, I can't. You have my full respect, man. Your ghetto story is

by jk4930 17y ago

Initially I wanted to post a silly comment to the original question, but after I read your answer, I can't. You have my full respect, man. Your ghetto story is way more awesome than mine. :)

buro9 17y ago
I'll admit something... my story hampers my present. The problem with such a dark background and fighting out of it is that once out, not going back dominates everything you do. This translates to, "Don't risk what you have". And therein lies a problem, if I have little but can't risk it then I'm risk averse and cannot gamble on high risk opportunities. I desperately want to do a start-up and to do something new, but what could possibly encourage me to risk what I now have, I've earned a normal life and I have no plan B were I to jeopardise it. So I fight to never go back, which isn't the same as fighting to get somewhere in the future. The real achievement, if I ever manage it, will be to get out of that predicament and to be free to take risk without fearing too greatly the repercussions. I probably won't ever be back on the street, but it's very hard to shake the fear of it. If someone else's tale can tell me how to do that I'd be grateful.
- pasbesoin 17y ago
  Will the MSc help by providing a "safe" fallback position / opportunities should a venture not succeed (and/or a sense of same)? I don't mean the question simply rhetorically -- although it initially popped into my mind in kind of that sense. I really wonder what your perspective is in that regard.
  - buro9 17y ago
    I hope so. I have no A-levels and no prior college education (due to being on the street at that point). The risk I think I have is that if I find myself out of work then no matter how good I am I won't find a job in a world where HR systems have check boxes to filter candidates. If "has degree" is a pre-req on a position then currently I won't even have my CV considered. The MSc is the highest level thing I could attain with no pre-requisites save for experience. It is, for me, an insurance policy for what is now a career (a job is what I had when I was doing manual labour). I have two goals for the degree: 1) Reduce risk of unemployment. 2) Increase chance of employment by a company that works on interesting things (I want to be the dumbest guy in the room so that I can learn even more). What's been interesting is reading recent posts on HN and elsewhere about how dire education is and questioning its value. Yet for me it may be a life-saver and at GBP 7k is a bargain if it just keeps me employed. Only by reducing my risk and creating a buffer and fall-back am I going to be able to be free of the fear of failing... or so I believe currently. Anyhow, the MSc after more than a decade of experience... I'm pleased by how much I do know, and have loved discovering the gaps in my knowledge. I especially love set theory, graph databases, semi-structured data, and the data structures, storage and algorithms for these things. As insurance goes, I'm not sure anything else could've also given me so much satisfaction to do and yet also is so universally recognised.
    - ErrantX 17y ago
      Who are you doing the Msc with? (Im currently doing mine with the OU and I got the impression your doing the same?)
      - buro9 17y ago
        Birkbeck, University of London. They're got a couple of great professors and a few not-so-good ones. The great ones more than make up for the others and it's probably no surprise that their subjects also interest me the most. I should be graduating this year (or maybe it's next year?), my project proposal is being reviewed and exams are in about 7 weeks time.
        ErrantX 17y ago
        > They're got a couple of great professors and a few not-so-good ones. Heh, ain't that always the way. Good luck with those exams!
    - jaxn 17y ago
      I understand the HR checkbox fear completely. I have been doing my own thing (limping along) for two years (as of this month) and out of the workforce. I don't have a college degree and am not sure if I can get a job when I need one. I am not sure it is a completely rational fear since I have relationships in the industry, but it is not exactly a confidence booster.
    - Quarrelsome 17y ago
      I'm UK too and have no A-levels or Degree. I studied and dropped out of performing arts! No issue in getting a job though. It's the experience, passion and determination that counts IMO. And only a few monolithic companies have those checkboxes.
      - wdewind 17y ago
        My experience exactly (dropped out after 2 years). If a company requires a degree as an absolute, they most likely don't have super smart people working there, or it wont be a particularly great place to work (the government and large financial institutions come to mind).
- barrkel 17y ago
  I know what you mean. I came from a fairly poor background myself - nothing as harrowing as your own though - and find myself more frugal than many of my peers. I tend not to commit to things that will become long-term obligations (for example, I rent and have no debt) and I save obsessively. I tend to measure my savings in how many years I could go without having to work. I think being in this kind of position helps with the fear.
- gstar 17y ago
  The great thing about the benefits system in the UK is that you just won't, unless you want to. If you really do want to take the risk of starting a business, even if you do fail - you'll never be back on the streets.
- jacquesm 17y ago
  First off, I'm very much impressed by your tenaciousness. > The problem with such a dark background and fighting out of it is that once out, not going back dominates everything you do. This translates to, "Don't risk what you have". I so agree with that, I feel that exactly like you do, and my background isn't nearly as rough as yours, not by a long shot. Screwed up childhoods seem to come in all shapes and sizes. I try to make reasonably small steps in order not to fail too badly. If I was more risk oriented I would have probably made out much better than I have, but whenever something works I become ultra conservative about it. Investing in other peoples ventures is one of the ways in which I try to cure myself of that, it's been slow going and my 'batting average' so far is not fantastic but it still works for me. It splits the 'fight to go back' from the 'fight to go forward', I literally write off the investment the moment it's done and from there it can only go 'up', not drag me back. And it gives someone else a chance to fight their way out of whatever hole they're in.

by jk4930 17y ago

Initially I wanted to post a silly comment to the original question, but after I read your answer, I can't. You have my full respect, man. Your ghetto story is way more awesome than mine. :)

buro9 17y ago

I'll admit something... my story hampers my present. The problem with such a dark background and fighting out of it is that once out, not going back dominates everything you do. This translates to, "Don't risk what you have". And therein lies a problem, if I have little but can't risk it then I'm risk averse and cannot gamble on high risk opportunities. I desperately want to do a start-up and to do something new, but what could possibly encourage me to risk what I now have, I've earned a normal life and I have no plan B were I to jeopardise it. So I fight to never go back, which isn't the same as fighting to get somewhere in the future. The real achievement, if I ever manage it, will be to get out of that predicament and to be free to take risk without fearing too greatly the repercussions. I probably won't ever be back on the street, but it's very hard to shake the fear of it. If someone else's tale can tell me how to do that I'd be grateful.

pasbesoin 17y ago
Will the MSc help by providing a "safe" fallback position / opportunities should a venture not succeed (and/or a sense of same)? I don't mean the question simply rhetorically -- although it initially popped into my mind in kind of that sense. I really wonder what your perspective is in that regard.
- buro9 17y ago
  I hope so. I have no A-levels and no prior college education (due to being on the street at that point). The risk I think I have is that if I find myself out of work then no matter how good I am I won't find a job in a world where HR systems have check boxes to filter candidates. If "has degree" is a pre-req on a position then currently I won't even have my CV considered. The MSc is the highest level thing I could attain with no pre-requisites save for experience. It is, for me, an insurance policy for what is now a career (a job is what I had when I was doing manual labour). I have two goals for the degree: 1) Reduce risk of unemployment. 2) Increase chance of employment by a company that works on interesting things (I want to be the dumbest guy in the room so that I can learn even more). What's been interesting is reading recent posts on HN and elsewhere about how dire education is and questioning its value. Yet for me it may be a life-saver and at GBP 7k is a bargain if it just keeps me employed. Only by reducing my risk and creating a buffer and fall-back am I going to be able to be free of the fear of failing... or so I believe currently. Anyhow, the MSc after more than a decade of experience... I'm pleased by how much I do know, and have loved discovering the gaps in my knowledge. I especially love set theory, graph databases, semi-structured data, and the data structures, storage and algorithms for these things. As insurance goes, I'm not sure anything else could've also given me so much satisfaction to do and yet also is so universally recognised.
  - ErrantX 17y ago
    Who are you doing the Msc with? (Im currently doing mine with the OU and I got the impression your doing the same?)
    - buro9 17y ago
      Birkbeck, University of London. They're got a couple of great professors and a few not-so-good ones. The great ones more than make up for the others and it's probably no surprise that their subjects also interest me the most. I should be graduating this year (or maybe it's next year?), my project proposal is being reviewed and exams are in about 7 weeks time.
      - ErrantX 17y ago
        > They're got a couple of great professors and a few not-so-good ones. Heh, ain't that always the way. Good luck with those exams!
  - jaxn 17y ago
    I understand the HR checkbox fear completely. I have been doing my own thing (limping along) for two years (as of this month) and out of the workforce. I don't have a college degree and am not sure if I can get a job when I need one. I am not sure it is a completely rational fear since I have relationships in the industry, but it is not exactly a confidence booster.
  - Quarrelsome 17y ago
    I'm UK too and have no A-levels or Degree. I studied and dropped out of performing arts! No issue in getting a job though. It's the experience, passion and determination that counts IMO. And only a few monolithic companies have those checkboxes.
    - wdewind 17y ago
      My experience exactly (dropped out after 2 years). If a company requires a degree as an absolute, they most likely don't have super smart people working there, or it wont be a particularly great place to work (the government and large financial institutions come to mind).
barrkel 17y ago
I know what you mean. I came from a fairly poor background myself - nothing as harrowing as your own though - and find myself more frugal than many of my peers. I tend not to commit to things that will become long-term obligations (for example, I rent and have no debt) and I save obsessively. I tend to measure my savings in how many years I could go without having to work. I think being in this kind of position helps with the fear.
gstar 17y ago
The great thing about the benefits system in the UK is that you just won't, unless you want to. If you really do want to take the risk of starting a business, even if you do fail - you'll never be back on the streets.
jacquesm 17y ago
First off, I'm very much impressed by your tenaciousness. > The problem with such a dark background and fighting out of it is that once out, not going back dominates everything you do. This translates to, "Don't risk what you have". I so agree with that, I feel that exactly like you do, and my background isn't nearly as rough as yours, not by a long shot. Screwed up childhoods seem to come in all shapes and sizes. I try to make reasonably small steps in order not to fail too badly. If I was more risk oriented I would have probably made out much better than I have, but whenever something works I become ultra conservative about it. Investing in other peoples ventures is one of the ways in which I try to cure myself of that, it's been slow going and my 'batting average' so far is not fantastic but it still works for me. It splits the 'fight to go back' from the 'fight to go forward', I literally write off the investment the moment it's done and from there it can only go 'up', not drag me back. And it gives someone else a chance to fight their way out of whatever hole they're in.