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Just make sure you don't hurt anyone's self-esteem and that's all you need to take care of. When giving feedback, criticism is inevitable so first increase the
by zuck9 10y ago
Just make sure you don't hurt anyone's self-esteem and that's all you need to take care of.
When giving feedback, criticism is inevitable so first increase their self-esteem by appreciating the things about their work you like. Then the criticism and then throw in another compliment if you can. Criticism sandwich.
Make sure you care about what other people feel. If what you (intentionally or not) make them feel bad, that'll reflect on your image in their head. If you make them feel good, they'll like you.
What you feel isn't always what they feel. If you point out their mistakes, you'll feel good but they won't. If you make a joke about them, others may laugh, you may laugh but that person will not like you.
A classic recommended read is "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie.
If you find it hard to maintain your calm, take up on meditation and make it a habit. It's scientifically proven and has a lot of benefits. Just search about meditation on hn.algolia.com if you are still skeptical.
- RUG3Y 10y agoI understand this tactic but an astute person realizes immediately what you're up to, and it can cause the opposite effect. You need to understand the person you're talking to.
- roflc0ptic 10y agoInteresting. I'm pretty aware when people use this on me and I appreciate the effort. I don't feel like I'm being manipulated, I feel like this person is taking the time to try to preserve the relationship. Agreed that you should take a moment to understand the person you're delivering criticism to, though.