5 ms·

Oof, being chided by dang, I definitely fucked up. I do think my window for editing it had long lapsed by the time you commented? Not that I'm entitled to your

Oof, being chided by dang, I definitely fucked up. I do think my window for editing it had long lapsed by the time you commented? Not that I'm entitled to your time, but I'd be grateful for clarification on the uncivil bits? "Good for you" was kinda condescending, I see; "Your post is nonsense" was in direct response to the first sentence of my parent, which said that grandparent "is nonsense", and is also factual and I made a good-faith case for it, is that really not okay? I guess "nonsense" is a charged word, perhaps it should have been something like "That post was not nonsense, it is your post that makes no sense."?

dang 10y ago
Well, you get points back for using the word 'chide'. And you didn't break the rules that badly, which is why my comment was mild. But here's a detailed explanation. Beginning a comment with "your post is nonsense" is leading with a left hook regardless of what was said upthread. Nothing good can come of it and it frames everything else that you say as hostile (even if it isn't). Perhaps there's a semi-technical meaning to "nonsense", but in the context of an internet forum it can only count as name-calling, which the guidelines prohibit (https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html). (By the way, rough-and-tumble discourse can function well in smaller, more cohesive contexts, e.g. research communities or literary salons. But it emphatically does not port to large internet communities. That's something it took me years to figure out.) Replacing it with "it is your post that makes no sense" doesn't help much, does it? (It reminds me of "I'm sorry the honorable member is a liar.") You'd be better off not rewording that bit but dropping it altogether. Sticking to the substance is a better way to show (not tell) the weaknesses of another comment. "Now you're making an actual point. Good for you." is just two condescending swipes in a row. That's like finishing with a couple of right hooks. And "Seriously, this is not how logic works" sounds condescending to me as well. If I read your comment without those bits it becomes much more substantive and respectful. The editing time I was talking about isn't the two-hour window for which comments are open to be edited, but an up-to-10-minute window you can have before your comments appear to others. (That's the 'delay' setting in the profile.) That lets you see your comment in the wild before it appears to other users, which sometimes helps clarify where it crosses into incivility—which can be difficult to see beforehand.

dang 10y ago

Well, you get points back for using the word 'chide'. And you didn't break the rules that badly, which is why my comment was mild. But here's a detailed explanation. Beginning a comment with "your post is nonsense" is leading with a left hook regardless of what was said upthread. Nothing good can come of it and it frames everything else that you say as hostile (even if it isn't). Perhaps there's a semi-technical meaning to "nonsense", but in the context of an internet forum it can only count as name-calling, which the guidelines prohibit (https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html). (By the way, rough-and-tumble discourse can function well in smaller, more cohesive contexts, e.g. research communities or literary salons. But it emphatically does not port to large internet communities. That's something it took me years to figure out.) Replacing it with "it is your post that makes no sense" doesn't help much, does it? (It reminds me of "I'm sorry the honorable member is a liar.") You'd be better off not rewording that bit but dropping it altogether. Sticking to the substance is a better way to show (not tell) the weaknesses of another comment. "Now you're making an actual point. Good for you." is just two condescending swipes in a row. That's like finishing with a couple of right hooks. And "Seriously, this is not how logic works" sounds condescending to me as well. If I read your comment without those bits it becomes much more substantive and respectful. The editing time I was talking about isn't the two-hour window for which comments are open to be edited, but an up-to-10-minute window you can have before your comments appear to others. (That's the 'delay' setting in the profile.) That lets you see your comment in the wild before it appears to other users, which sometimes helps clarify where it crosses into incivility—which can be difficult to see beforehand.