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Yeah, it sounds a bit extreme - but the point is once we're let go of everything, we get a clear idea of what needs doing, and what we need to leave behind. Las
by meric 10y ago
Yeah, it sounds a bit extreme - but the point is once we're let go of everything, we get a clear idea of what needs doing, and what we need to leave behind. Last time I did it I figured out what I wanted to do in two days.
The table's a mess. We're having a hard time figure out how to rearrange it. So, the "stranger" tells you to tip it all on the floor, you, not sure what happens when you do it, does it, and after a few moments, whatever we really need back on the table, we will pick it up, despite what the "stranger" says. We end up with what we really want, and everything else on the floor.
Sometimes family is really hurting ourselves, and it can be a wise choice to screw them and leave. A close relative of mine killed himself after years of emotional abuse from his mother. That's stuff that's happened to me before, and if, to survive, I have to leave whoever it is to sink or swim, then screw them. My survival and sanity is of prime importance. Sometimes, taking care of family is a luxury we can't afford.
- dorfuss 10y agoI agree with Meric - it's mostly about fighting the inner Deamons. At first one deamon feeds you with doubt: "oh, you are such a pathetic piece of shit, you're a bad programmer, bad worker, you don't know enough", and then, when you want to change, another deamon: "oh you can't change, you are weak, you are too stupid" and "you have the mortgage, wife, your children's education". And then you start to hate yourself and have suicidal thoughts because the deamons make your life miserable. Meric is right in that you really don't have to do anything or be anything. You are not your work, and you are not your family. You can divorce, change jobs, change places, and you are allowed to fail. Most importantly: you are the most precious person to yourself, love this guy. Try maybe to realise that your existencial fears come from all past failures and dangerous situations, your limbic system just attacks you with the scarry visions, because this is what it evolved for: "see the tiger, recognize threat, run!" You could then do it like Zen buddhists: "I see the feeling coming, I look at it, I observe it, I know where it comes from, and I gracefully let it go".