Serious question: At what point does it become the problem of the person to integrate vs the problem of the group to accommodate? We've heard many stories of h

Serious question: At what point does it become the problem of the person to integrate vs the problem of the group to accommodate? We've heard many stories of how it only takes one asshole on a team to ruin the team. However, assholery takes many forms. It includes the perpetually acerbic who's impossible to work with, but it also includes the perpetually offended who derails conversations into pointless tone arguments and recursive meta-discussion unless you walk on metaphorical eggshells when speaking to them. Lots of talk about the former, little to none about the latter. I'd wager that if you're running a team whose purpose is to accomplish a set goal, the latter is necessarily more destructive than the former from a sheer time commitment standpoint, and that's before discussing the "meta is murder"[1] principle. Then again, I'm speaking from the standpoint of a group outsider. If you have a culture that demands civility above all else (up to and including logic and correctness), that group is probably okay with how they work, and would rightly judge poorly anyone who wouldn't conform to that culture. [1]: https://blog.codinghorror.com/meta-is-murder/ https://blog.codinghorror.com/meta-is-murder/