5 ms·

Any ideas why your employee brought it up to you (management) but does not want you (management) to do anything about it?

by whatok 10y ago

ceejayoz 10y ago
"I don't want to be seen as a problem, and I don't want this to be a case of management portraying it as 'that guy we love got fired because X can't take a joke'".
- whatok 10y ago
  What is a manager supposed to do in this situation that does not lead to something along the lines of that? In that case, why bother bringing it up?
  - icebraining 10y ago
    Keep an eye on him in case his behaviour persists? What may be reasonable and innocent done once, turns into harassment if done repeatedly, but if one just reports after many events, it's difficult to show the pattern.
    - whatok 10y ago
      I'd argue that calling someone a MILF in the workplace is already harassment. The problem with passively sitting by is that it can introduce more problems down the road because someone can claim that you passively sat by and fostered a hostile work environment. The harasser also has more credence if you only confront him until he does something else because at that point he can claim he didn't know it was a problem.
  - basch 10y ago
    "i heard what was said, and although she might not have a problem with what you did, I do" make it about you as management being the one that cant take the joke.
  - ceejayoz 10y ago
    "Evidence has come to light that X has acted in ways that are both illegal and unacceptable in our organization." versus "Y complained that X was flirting with her, so we had to fire him." It needs to be made clear that management finds the behavior unacceptable.
dragonwriter 10y ago
I would be very concerned that this is an indication that she has reason to expect that dealing with this problem will result in aneruption of other problems.on the team, which may stem from persistent, lower level harassment that is already occurring. That may actually be a bigger hostile work environment problem than the more blatant incident.
VLM 10y ago
Totally free blue sky daydreaming? 1) There's a pre-existing dysfunctional relationship, and she wants him in trouble but doesn't want to get caught setting him up or not telling the whole truth. Aside from obvious romantic relationship, might have been professional, perhaps a grudge developed at a previous employer. Or even school rivalry. Or something more tenuous like he cheated on her roommate making her roommate cry so she feels justified... Good luck discretely figuring this out without being declared a victim-blamer. Your lawyer will help. 2) They're teaming up to siphon off money/stock/something by submitting a lawsuit next week for either wrongful dismissal and libel/slander (depending on what you say to the guy, if anything) or for sexual harassment from her end. Your lawyer will help. 3) See #1 above, it might be the dude who has a grudge with someone else at the company (the other founder?) and is hoping to mess with that 3rd party and you're just kinda in the way. Your lawyer will help.

Any ideas why your employee brought it up to you (management) but does not want you (management) to do anything about it?

by whatok 10y ago

Any ideas why your employee brought it up to you (management) but does not want you (management) to do anything about it?

ceejayoz 10y ago

"I don't want to be seen as a problem, and I don't want this to be a case of management portraying it as 'that guy we love got fired because X can't take a joke'".

whatok 10y ago
What is a manager supposed to do in this situation that does not lead to something along the lines of that? In that case, why bother bringing it up?
- icebraining 10y ago
  Keep an eye on him in case his behaviour persists? What may be reasonable and innocent done once, turns into harassment if done repeatedly, but if one just reports after many events, it's difficult to show the pattern.
  - whatok 10y ago
    I'd argue that calling someone a MILF in the workplace is already harassment. The problem with passively sitting by is that it can introduce more problems down the road because someone can claim that you passively sat by and fostered a hostile work environment. The harasser also has more credence if you only confront him until he does something else because at that point he can claim he didn't know it was a problem.
- basch 10y ago
  "i heard what was said, and although she might not have a problem with what you did, I do" make it about you as management being the one that cant take the joke.
- ceejayoz 10y ago
  "Evidence has come to light that X has acted in ways that are both illegal and unacceptable in our organization." versus "Y complained that X was flirting with her, so we had to fire him." It needs to be made clear that management finds the behavior unacceptable.

dragonwriter 10y ago

I would be very concerned that this is an indication that she has reason to expect that dealing with this problem will result in aneruption of other problems.on the team, which may stem from persistent, lower level harassment that is already occurring. That may actually be a bigger hostile work environment problem than the more blatant incident.

VLM 10y ago

Totally free blue sky daydreaming? 1) There's a pre-existing dysfunctional relationship, and she wants him in trouble but doesn't want to get caught setting him up or not telling the whole truth. Aside from obvious romantic relationship, might have been professional, perhaps a grudge developed at a previous employer. Or even school rivalry. Or something more tenuous like he cheated on her roommate making her roommate cry so she feels justified... Good luck discretely figuring this out without being declared a victim-blamer. Your lawyer will help. 2) They're teaming up to siphon off money/stock/something by submitting a lawsuit next week for either wrongful dismissal and libel/slander (depending on what you say to the guy, if anything) or for sexual harassment from her end. Your lawyer will help. 3) See #1 above, it might be the dude who has a grudge with someone else at the company (the other founder?) and is hoping to mess with that 3rd party and you're just kinda in the way. Your lawyer will help.