3 ms·

I feel like a lot of people are missing the larger point of this story: BE KIND. Because everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle you know nothing about.

by Nrsolis 10y ago

I feel like a lot of people are missing the larger point of this story: BE KIND. Because everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle you know nothing about. I'm not going to excuse her rant or her poor decision making skills as she navigates her way through life. What I am going to sympathize with is the fact that she had a rough start in life and precious few examples around her to show her how to make good vs. bad decisions. I meet plenty of people like this; people who are unprepared for the rush of responsibility they carry when thrust out in the world to care for themselves. Most of us at least know what we should be doing even if we don't always do it. We had an example. I don't think this young woman had that benefit and now she is learning the hard way all of the lessons she should have been learning long ago. So may very well be a spoiled-brat entitled millennial, but I'm more inclined to suggest that her story is a lot more complicated than we've been led to believe, even given what we've learned about her upbringing from this article. (Side note: one of my buddies is now retiring from the US Marine Corps; I didn't find out until I heard from someone planning his retirement party that before he joined the Marines he'd been homeless. When I tell you that he's one of the most inspiring and intelligent people I know, I'm not exaggerating. BE KIND.)

whatok 10y ago
> precious few examples around her to show her how to make good vs. bad decisions. I don't need examples to conduct basic arithmetic to show that I cannot afford somewhere to live. There are millions of people with similar or worse upbringing who actually learn something from that upbringing and decide to not do dumb shit that has a high chance of introducing financial ruin.
- Nrsolis 10y ago
  And here we have another example of someone who doesn't get it. You're saying that you wouldn't make the mistakes she has made because you'd know better, right? You'd use math or logic or any of your abilities to make the CORRECT choice, right? You're completely missing the fact that it's not YOU that's got the burden of making those correct choices, but HER. And she is having a hard time doing it despite her best efforts. Somewhere in the world, there is a guy judging you for screwing up because HE knew better than you did when you made that last mistake you made. And boy....THAT one was a WHOPPER. What were you THINKING?!?!
  - whatok 10y ago
    > You're saying that you wouldn't make the mistakes she has made because you'd know better, right? You'd use math or logic or any of your abilities to make the CORRECT choice, right? No, I'm saying that was red flag number one. She then made a series of mistakes that led to her current situation. All of the facts were available to her when she signed up for the job and instead of accepting personal responsibility, she pointed the finger at her employer. She would have a leg to stand on had she been a long-term employee that got caught up in rising rents or something similar but that was not the case. I have empathy for everyone who gets caught up in bad situations that are out of their control. I do not have any for someone who willfully enters into a situation and blames someone else for the outcome. If I'm unable to sustain my current state of living with a job I voluntarily chose, how is it anyone else's fault but my own? > Somewhere in the world, there is a guy judging you for screwing up because HE knew better than you did when you made that last mistake you made. And boy....THAT one was a WHOPPER. What were you THINKING?!?! When I make mistakes, I accept responsibility, learn from them, and try not to make them again. I do not try to publicly shame someone else who could at best be described as indirectly contributing to my situation. I'm quite okay with anyone judging me because I only have control over what I do in a situation and if I let something like that affect me, I could potentially miss out on gaining experience that can only be learned through failure.
    - Nrsolis 10y ago
      That's YOU bub. That's not HER. YOU learned to accept responsibility. SHE didn't. YOU learned to acknowledge your mistakes. SHE didn't. Now she IS learning and she's learning it the HARD way instead of the EASY way, namely, by haranguing from the Internet Mob. Buddy, you need to really think about this. Are you so callous that you can't see that there wasn't a single person in this girl's life that showed her how to stand on her own two feet? She'll either learn or she won't. It's going to be hard for her either way. Are you so indifferent to someone's struggle that you can't at a minimum think about how hard it must be to live their life and be thankful you're not similarly burdened?
      - whatok 10y ago
rm_-rf_slash 10y ago
If there is any comment in this thread that should be read, that was it. It's easy to lose sight of our humanity when we live comfortable lives, isolated from the people who don't. We make ourselves succeptible to compelling narratives to make us feel more secure about ourselves, and more justified in being unkind or unempathetic to others.

by Nrsolis 10y ago

whatok 10y ago

> precious few examples around her to show her how to make good vs. bad decisions. I don't need examples to conduct basic arithmetic to show that I cannot afford somewhere to live. There are millions of people with similar or worse upbringing who actually learn something from that upbringing and decide to not do dumb shit that has a high chance of introducing financial ruin.

Nrsolis 10y ago
And here we have another example of someone who doesn't get it. You're saying that you wouldn't make the mistakes she has made because you'd know better, right? You'd use math or logic or any of your abilities to make the CORRECT choice, right? You're completely missing the fact that it's not YOU that's got the burden of making those correct choices, but HER. And she is having a hard time doing it despite her best efforts. Somewhere in the world, there is a guy judging you for screwing up because HE knew better than you did when you made that last mistake you made. And boy....THAT one was a WHOPPER. What were you THINKING?!?!
- whatok 10y ago
  > You're saying that you wouldn't make the mistakes she has made because you'd know better, right? You'd use math or logic or any of your abilities to make the CORRECT choice, right? No, I'm saying that was red flag number one. She then made a series of mistakes that led to her current situation. All of the facts were available to her when she signed up for the job and instead of accepting personal responsibility, she pointed the finger at her employer. She would have a leg to stand on had she been a long-term employee that got caught up in rising rents or something similar but that was not the case. I have empathy for everyone who gets caught up in bad situations that are out of their control. I do not have any for someone who willfully enters into a situation and blames someone else for the outcome. If I'm unable to sustain my current state of living with a job I voluntarily chose, how is it anyone else's fault but my own? > Somewhere in the world, there is a guy judging you for screwing up because HE knew better than you did when you made that last mistake you made. And boy....THAT one was a WHOPPER. What were you THINKING?!?! When I make mistakes, I accept responsibility, learn from them, and try not to make them again. I do not try to publicly shame someone else who could at best be described as indirectly contributing to my situation. I'm quite okay with anyone judging me because I only have control over what I do in a situation and if I let something like that affect me, I could potentially miss out on gaining experience that can only be learned through failure.
  - Nrsolis 10y ago
    That's YOU bub. That's not HER. YOU learned to accept responsibility. SHE didn't. YOU learned to acknowledge your mistakes. SHE didn't. Now she IS learning and she's learning it the HARD way instead of the EASY way, namely, by haranguing from the Internet Mob. Buddy, you need to really think about this. Are you so callous that you can't see that there wasn't a single person in this girl's life that showed her how to stand on her own two feet? She'll either learn or she won't. It's going to be hard for her either way. Are you so indifferent to someone's struggle that you can't at a minimum think about how hard it must be to live their life and be thankful you're not similarly burdened?
    - whatok 10y ago

rm_-rf_slash 10y ago

If there is any comment in this thread that should be read, that was it. It's easy to lose sight of our humanity when we live comfortable lives, isolated from the people who don't. We make ourselves succeptible to compelling narratives to make us feel more secure about ourselves, and more justified in being unkind or unempathetic to others.